Winner At A Losing Game
by LaughingSmile
Summary: This takes place about two years after the bonfire. Alex stayed and she's with Marissa, but everything's not so great.
1. Dreams

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

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"I never asked you to give up your life. I only wanted to be a part of it!" yelled Alex.

"Well, this is my life," answered Marissa. "Take a look. What do you think?"

The blonde looked at the group of teenagers having fun. Teenagers. Just like her. Yet, they were so different. Their biggest worry was probably what to wear to the latest party. Hers was whether or not she could make next month's rent. They'll never have to worry about that. It must be nice. There was a whole world of difference between them. She's always known this, but somehow it's never seemed as clear as it does now. It never seemed so defining. It was almost more than she could bear. She sighed inwardly and went to sit on a nearby rock. Marissa followed suit. Alex met her gaze. Honestly, she could care less about the differences between them. It was the overwhelming differences between her and the girl in front of her that she cared about. "I think that this is your life….and I don't fit in."

"I really wanted this to work," replied Marissa. "I never wanted to hurt you. I'm sorry, Alex."

"I can't really blame you for not feeling the same way." Alex looked at the group of teenagers again. "I don't think Newport's for me."

"What do you mean?" questioned the brunette. "Are you leaving?"

"Maybe," she answered. Perhaps I'll go back to LA. I just….I just need to leave."

"Yea?"

"Yea. Goodbye Marissa."

"Goodbye Alex." They went to hug one last time. However, Alex started to hear a beeping noise. Confused, Alex looked around for the origin of the sound.

Beep! Beep! Beep!

The sound of an alarm clock woke the blonde. She glanced at it. 6:00AM. She let out a grunt as she started to wake up the person next to her. "Marissa, wake up. Marissa….Marissa!"

"What?!" exclaimed the sleepy brunette.

"Your alarm is going off."

"So shut it," she answered matter of factly.

"It's on your side," Alex said as she yawned. "It's _your_ alarm."

"Don't be lazy, Al"

"Lazy?" she said incredulously. "It's on _your_ side. All you have to do is reach over."

"And….."

"Marissa…."

"Alex."

Frustrated, the blonde got out of bed, walked to the other side, and turned off the alarm. "You did it wrong," Marissa said.

Alex looked at her confused. "What do you mean? It's off, is it not?"

Marissa turned so that she was on her back, looking at Alex. "You were supposed to reach over me, _not_ get out of bed."

The blonde was beyond irritated. "Marissa, what difference does it-"

Alex was cut off as Marissa quickly and unexpectedly grabbed her hand and pulled her on top of the brunette's body. "The difference is that I could've given you this quicker." Before Alex could even question her, Marissa gave her a long, sensual kiss. When Alex tried to deepen it, the brunette broke the kiss. Alex tried to kiss her again but Marissa dodged it. "Nuh-uh."

"Marissa….," whined the blonde.

"Nope. I'm going to be late if you do that."

"It's just a kiss, Marissa."

"But it wouldn't stop there. Since _someone_ took forever to turn off the alarm, our make out time has been cut short."

The blonde pouted. "But-"

"No buts." Marissa got out from under Alex. "I gotta get ready for school." She gave her one last quick kiss and disappeared into the bathroom.

Alex didn't even have time to wallow as the alarm went off again. She glared at it, silently cursing herself for only hitting the snooze button. _What do you know? I did it wrong after all. _She went to turn it off, and contemplated throwing it against a wall.

"Don't even think about it, Al!"

She entertained the idea of not listening to Marissa, but then thought better of it. "She won't always be able to save you. You and the wall are destined to meet each other. It's only a matter of time." With that, she decided to join her girlfriend in the bathroom.


	2. Alone Again

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**A/N: I never really watched The O.C. I said that the story takes place about two years after the bonfire. I wasn't ****sure how**** old they were, but since they could drive, I guessed 16. I know that Alex was 17, but that's the only definite. So this would be their ****senior**** year. Sorry if the timeline is off.**

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Alex was wiping a glass when she remembered her dream, a dream that was no stranger to her subconscious. In reality, she had stayed. Marissa had convinced her that she wanted the relationship, that she wanted her. Yet, her dreams kept giving her a different outcome. Given the numerous times she's had that particular dream, she couldn't help but wonder if it were some sort of sign. Add the status of their relationship now; the idea did seem so farfetched.

Despite Marissa's playful behavior earlier, Alex knew that moments like that were rare. Things were great for the first year after the night of the bonfire. Marissa continued to live with her. She had told the brunette that if she wanted to go back home, she'd understand. Marissa was used to the more luxurious side of life-the side that Alex couldn't give her. Still, Marissa wanted to stay. Despite her mom's threats, she didn't think her mom would actually follow through on them. If her mom did, then she'd just raise hell. However, Marissa had seemed to be right about her mom. So Marissa still had her money, even offered to pay her share. Alex declined the offer. She wanted Marissa's life to be as much the same as if she were living at home as possible. Everything should've been fine. Things never work out like they are supposed to though.

Marissa still hung out with Ryan-something the blonde had to learn to deal with. Ryan was her first love. He'd always have a place in her heart, just like Jodie would in hers. Relationship or no, they were still friends, and Alex had no right to tell Marissa who she could be friends with. After all, she was still friends with Jodie. It didn't happen right away, but eventually they were able to restore their friendship. She was grateful for that. So while she wasn't completely fond of it, Alex still encouraged Marissa to continue her friendship with Ryan. She had to learn to trust Marissa. Otherwise their relationship would never last.

Surprisingly enough, Ryan wasn't really a problem for them. Somewhere along the way, Marissa changed. She didn't hang or with Ryan as much. That should've made the blonde happier, but it didn't. She started to stay out late longer, even on school nights. Granted Marissa skipped school a lot in the beginning of their relationship, Alex made her promise to put an end to that. Her grades were still up, but it was mostly the result of last minute cram sessions. Alex always helped her with those. A lot of the subjects were out of her league, but she helped anyway, even if it meant she wouldn't be able to rest before she had to go back to work.

She also started hanging out with a different crew. At first, she still hung with Summer, but now her time was more spent with her new friends. More specifically, it was spent was some guy named Volchok. Alex wasn't sure how the two met. When she asked Marissa, she would just give some vague answer. She'd seen him a few times when he stopped by the Bait Shop, but they've never really been introduced. All she knew was that she didn't like him. She even preferred Ryan over him.

Alex rarely ever saw Marissa anymore. Before, she'd come by the club to visit for an hour or so whenever she could. She'd set her alarm to wake up when Alex got home so that they could spend some time together before it was time to go to school. She was seldom affectionate these days. The blonde couldn't even remember the last time she heard her say "I love you" to her. A part of her feared she didn't feel the same way anymore. However, Marissa was always able to convince her that she did still love the blonde. While Alex let herself believe her words, something always prevented her from believing it whole-heartedly.

There were a lot of other little things. Their fights increased. Their sex life was pretty much non-existent. Single people had more sex than she did. She went to bed alone more times than she did when she wasn't seeing anyone. Still, there were moments-moments like this morning. Moments when Marissa was her old self again. Moments when it felt like she cared. They were enough to tie Alex over until she was blessed with another moment. They were enough for now.

"Alex!"

The blonde was snapped out her thoughts when she heard someone scream her name. "A little louder, Seth. I don't think the rest of California heard you."

"I've been calling your name for last five minutes," replied Seth. "Wipe that glass any longer, and it's going to have a hole in it."

Alex realized that was indeed still wiping the same glass. She stopped her actions. "What are you doing here, Seth?"

"I had a free period, so I thought I'd pay my favorite bartender a visit."

"Lucky me," answered the blonde sarcastically.

"Hey! I'm hurt."

"Yea, yea. Too bad my girlfriend doesn't want to spend any time with me." She said the last part quietly, but Seth still heard it.

"Alex…."

"Seth, please don't start." The fact that hers and Marissa's relationship was on shaky ground wasn't exactly a secret. Still, the last thing she needed was Seth, or anyone else, lecturing to her.

"It's just….," Seth searched for his words carefully, "I wouldn't put up with it if Summer treated me the way Marissa treats you."

"Please!" replied the blonde. "You'd put up with it and so much more. You worship the ground she walks on."

"True," agreed Seth, "but she _wouldn't_ treat me that way. She loves me."

This infuriated the blonde. It was bad enough that _she_ had doubts about Marissa's feelings. She didn't need anyone else adding to it. "Look-just because our relationship isn't perfect like yours doesn't mean she doesn't love me. So we're having problems. So we have fights. It doesn't mean anything!"

"Alex, I'm just trying-"

"Just leave Seth!"

He sighed in defeat. He hadn't meant to anger Alex. He was just trying to help. He couldn't stand the way Marissa was treating her. Still, he knew behind Alex's anger was fear. He'd be scared too if he thought Summer no longer loved him, no longer wanted to be with him. He risked placing a hand on her shoulder. "I'm here for you. I'm _your_ friend too." With that, he turned around and left.

Alex watched him leave. She felt bad for blowing up at him. She just wasn't ready to face the truth yet.

She went to bed that night alone….again.


	3. Another Sign

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Thanks for the reviews! **

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Alex woke only to find that she was still alone. The only thing worse than going to bed alone was waking up alone. She looked around the room. The articles of clothing lying around let her know that Marissa had come home at some point. Still, she had to make sure. She got out of bed and grabbed her phone off the nightstand. She dialed Marissa's number while she was picking up the clothes. She got her voice mail. "Hey, it's me. Just calling to say hi and to see how you were. I'm assuming you're at school. Let me know. Alright, hope to see you soon. Love you."

She threw the clothes in the hamper. She made her way to the kitchen. While rummaging through the fridge, she got a text message. _Yes, I'm at school. Happy now? _Alex breathed out a sigh. Despite all the changes, Marissa still went to school as promised. Still, there was a part of Alex that worried that it wouldn't be long before _that_ changed too. She couldn't have that. She wasn't sure what she'd do if that happened. She pushed the thought aside, grateful that day has yet to arrive. Frustrated that she couldn't find anything appealing to eat, Alex gave up. She checked the time. It was a little after noon. She had about an hour before she had to go check on things at work. She decided to grab something at the pier.

When she got there, Alex took a moment to look at the water. She loved the water. She tried to remember the last time she went surfing. A wave of sadness washed over her when she realized she couldn't remember when that was. She made a mental note to do it again sometime soon. The Bait Shop was pretty much her life now. She worked there every chance she could. It kept her busy. It kept her mind off her relationship with Marissa. She had even joked once that it was good thing that her girlfriend didn't seem to want to spend time with her since she lacked the time to do so. But she would _make _time. All Marissa had to do was say the word. Alex could feel the tears starting to form, but she refused to shed them. She took a deep breath, glanced once more at the water, and continued her search for food.

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It was Friday night, and the club was packed. Alex liked nights like these. It kept her mind ocuppied. She was busy fixing up a drink when she heard her name.

"Hey, Alex."

She looked up to see who it was. She wasn't too surprised when she realized who it was. "Ryan."

"How's it going?" the boy asked.

"Same ol', same ol'," replied the blonde. "Where's Taylor?" Ryan had been dating Taylor Townshed for almost a year now. She had actually introduced the two. She came to the Bait Shop one day while it was still closed. She had meant no harm. She just wanted to check the place out. Alex told her to come back later that night to see it at its best. Taylor did. She hung out at the bar for the most part. Her family had just moved here so Alex was pretty much the only person she knew. When Marissa came by that night, along with Summer and the gang, she introduced Taylor to them. They seemed to hit it off pretty well. It was later found out that Taylor would also be attending Harbor High. Alex took a moment to recall her conversation with Taylor that next day.

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_"Hey, did you forget we're closed during the day? Are you sure you're Harbor material?" joked the blonde._

_"Ha ha," replied Taylor. "__Actually__, I wanted to talk to you….well, ask you something."_

_Alex noticed the girl's shyness. "What's on your mind?"_

_"Well….it's about that guy-Ryan."_

_"What about him?"_

_"Is he seeing anyone? Just curious, you know?"_

_Alex entertained the idea of having some fun at Taylor's expense, but the girl was nervous enough as it was. "Nope. He's single. Very single."_

_"Really? I just thought that he and….Marissa were together. They seemed cozy."_

_Alex's smile dropped. Even to a stranger, it seemed obvious that Ryan and Marissa would be good together. She'd always be in his shadow. "Uh….no, they're not. I mean, they used to date. She's actually with me now."_

_"Oh. I'm sorry, I didn't know-"_

_"It's okay. Does it bother you?"_

_"That you're gay? Not really."_

_"I'm actually bi, but yeah."_

_"I'm sorry about my comment earlier. I didn't realize you and Marissa-"_

_"It's okay," interrupted Alex. "You didn't k now, and they do __complement__ each other well."_

_"Yeah," was all Taylor could think of to say. An awkward silence fell between them. After about a minute or so, Taylor began to speak again. "So….do __you think__ I have a chance? With Ryan?"_

_"I don't see why not," Alex answered._

_"Think you could put in a good word for me?"_

_"The thing is….we don't really talk all that much. You know, given Marissa…."_

_"Right."_

_The bartender saw the look of defeat play across the brunette's face. It wasn't something she liked seeing. "But if the opportunity presents itself, I will."_

_"Really?" This instantly brought a smile upon Taylor's face._

_"Really."_

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Looking back, Alex should've taken Taylor's assessment of Marissa and Ryan as a sign. It wasn't too long after that day that their relationship started to crumble. _Another sign to add to the list. Great"_

"Alex?"

She snapped out of her thoughts. She'd forgotten that she was partaking in an actual conversation. "Sorry. My mind seems to wander a lot these days. So where's Taylor again?"

"She should be here in a bit," replied the boy. "She's been stressed lately-with graduation on the horizon and all. College seems to be on her mind 24/7. She hasn't heard back from Berkley yet, and she's beyond freaked."

Alex nodded sympathetically. Alex pretty much fought tooth and nail to get Marissa to apply for college. There were many times that they fought over it. Fortunately, Alex was able to convince Marissa to apply.

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_"I just don't see the point," claimed the brunette. "I mean, it's not like I'll have to work for a living."_

_"Marissa," sighed Alex._

_"What? It's true. I don't."_

_"I know that sweetie, but this way you'll have options. I mean, I thought you wanted to do something fashion-related. What happened to that?"_

_"I changed my mind," Marissa answered simply._

_"Well, what if you change your mind again? This way you'll at least have the option to pursue it."_

_"Have you forgotten? My mother's Julie Cooper."_

_"Wouldn't you rather do it on your own? I mean, at least apply. I'm not saying you have to go, but there's nothing wrong with just applying. Worst case scenario-you don't want to end up like me do you? A girl with no education to fall back on and pretty much nowhere to go."_

_Marissa fell silent. She had to admit, it hurt a little to not hear Marissa come to her defense. Yes, that was exactly what Alex was, but knowing that her girlfriend saw her that way didn't exactly produce any butterflies. "Just apply, Marissa. That's all I ask."_

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"Alex!!!!"

"Huh? What?" Alex looked at Ryan. She have him an apologetic smile. "Sorry….again"

"No big, but….." Ryan gestured with his head, "you have some customers that might not be as forgiving as me."

Alex looked down the bar. "Right. Be back in a bit."


	4. Truce

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Thanks for the reviews.**

* * *

"I'll have a rum and coke please," ordered a brunette, "but hold the rum. Oh, could you make it a diet coke, too?"

"Taylor, wouldn't it have been easier to just say diet coke?" asked the blonde bartender.

"I did, didn't I?" Taylor turned to look at her boyfriend. "Ryan, isn't that what I said?"

"Yes, sweetie," replied Ryan.

"See!" exclaimed the brunette. "Alex, you should probably get your hearing check. I mean, it's pretty vital to your job, you know."

Alex looked at the girl completely dumbfounded. She looked over at Ryan. He just shook his and gave her a look that told her to just go with it. "I'll get on it. Be right back."

"So….," started Ryan, "did you get any letters?"

"No," the girl sighed. She felt defeated.

Ryan hated to see his girlfriend so down. "Don't worry," he said, trying to comfort her. "It really is still early. I haven't gotten any yet. Give it another week or so."

Taylor knew what Ryan was saying was true, but she couldn't help but worry. "I know. I just…I can't help it." She cupped his cheek. "Thanks."

"For what?"

"For being so patient with me. I know I haven't been the most pleasant person to be around these days."

"I haven't noticed." Taylor couldn't help but smile at her boyfriend's words. She leaned in and gave him a quick kiss.

Unfortunately, their kiss coincided with Alex's return. Alex couldn't help but feel a little envious. She was happy for the two, and she was glad that they were still going strong. Still, the feeling of envy was still there. "Get a room," she joked. "Here's your order-rum and coke, minus the rum. Sorry, it took me so long. I had a couple of orders ahead of yours."

"Alex, you were gone for like a minute, if that," replied Taylor. She went to sip her drink. "And it's diet too! Alex your skills are so awesome!"

Alex just shook her head. "Thanks."

"So Alex," started Taylor, "has Marissa received any letters yet?"

"What kind of letters?" asked a voice from behind. The three turned in the direction of the voice.

"Marissa!" shouted Taylor. She went a grabbed Marissa into a hug. "How are you? I feel like I haven't seen you in forever!"

"I'm good," replied the brunette, "but I would be better if you would let go and let me breathe."

"Oh, sorry." Taylor released her grip on Marissa and gave her a sheepish smile.

"No big. So what kind of letters were you talking about?"

"College acceptance letters"

"Oh. I don't know. Did I, Alex?"

It took a second for the blonde to realize that Marissa was talking to her. "Oh….um, not yet."

"See, there really was no point in my applying."

"It's still early, Marissa," responded Alex, echoing Ryan's earlier words.

"Whatever," dismissed the brunette. "Actually, I was wondering if I could talk to you for a bit, Alex."

The bartender couldn't hide her surprise at Marissa's word. "Um, let me just tell Mandy. I'll only be a sec." With that, she left.

"So where's Summer and Seth?" asked Marissa.

"They should be here soon," answered Ryan, "if they aren't already. What are you up to tonight?"

"Just hanging with Volchok and whatnot."

"Oh!" exclaimed Taylor. "We totally need to hang out soon. The six of us. It's been too long! What do you say Marissa? Come on, it'll be fun."

"Uh…" started Marissa.

"Come on!" continued the brunette. "I'll get Summer on you, and you know you don't want that!"

Marissa couldn't help but give a slight chuckle. "No, I don't, but I'm kind of busy this week. Maybe next week?"

"Sure," replied Taylor, "but don't think I'll forget. I'll call you, and so will Summer."

"Well, I'll have to talk with Alex about it. I mean, she's the busier one-with work and all."

"Ask me what?"

Marissa turned to see Alex returning. "Nothing. So are you free?"

"Yea," answered the blonde, "but let's hurry. I don't want to be gone too long, in case it gets slammed again."

"Well, you girls go chat," stated Ryan. "We're going to see if we can find Summer and Seth. They should be here by now."

"Okay, and hey Taylor?" Alex said. "Don't worry. They'll come." Taylor couldn't help but smile. She leaned over and gave the blonde a quick hug. "Thanks," she whispered.

"Alright, break it up," joked Ryan. "See you guys." He looked at Alex, grateful for what she said to Taylor. "Thanks, Al."

"Anytime." Alex waved goodbye to them. She turned towards Marissa. "Let's go to my office." The two made their way into the blonde's office. Alex went to shut door. She turned around to face a rather disgruntled looking Marissa. "What's up?"

"Al?" questioned Marissa. "Since when did you and Ryan get so chummy?" Alex just shrugged her shoulders. She wasn't exactly sure either. However, if she had to guess, she'd say it was probably when he paid her a visit many months ago.

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_"Hey"_

_Alex looked up to see who had spoken. She was surprised to find that Ryan was the owner of the salutation. "Hey." Both just stood there as an awkward silence overcame them. "So...what can I get you?" Alex asked, breaking the silence._

_"Just water, please." answered Ryan._

_Alex got him his water and went to check on her other customers, not that there were many._

_"Slow night, huh?" the boy said when Alex came back._

_"Yep." Alex wasn't trying to be rude, but Ryan wasn't exactly her favorite person._

_"So, I've been meaning to talk to you," started Ryan. "I just haven't had the time. Plus, I'm a little scared of you."_

_This surprised the blonde. "Of me? Why?"_

_"Well, for one thing, I know for a fact that you are surprisingly strong." Ryan thought back to that night when Alex nearly took his head off with a beer can. That night was so long ago. "I just...I just wanted to apologize." Alex gave him a questioning look. "For teaming up with Julie and all."_

_"Ryan, that was like almost a year ago."_

_"I know. Like I said, I've been busy. Listen, I know that you are tolerating me for Marissa's sake. That's very big of you." Alex simply shrugged off his compliment. "I just want you to know that you have nothing to worry about. I'm not going to try to steal her away from you. I also know that while you encouraged her to continue our friendship, it's not something that's easy to see. Especially, since she seems to increasingly spend more time with me."_

_This angered the blonde. What Ryan was saying true, but he didn't need to rub it in her face. "Look, if you've come over here to gloat-"_

_"No!" interrupted the sandy haired boy. "I don't know why Marissa's doing that. I just want you to know that nothing's going on. We're just friends. Also...I've been thinking of making myself less available for Marissa."_

_"Why?"_

_"Like I said, I know it's not easy to see your girl hanging with her ex all the time."_

_"You don't need to do me any favors, Ryan."_

_"I know. I'm just letting you know what I'm doing. If it happens to benefit you also, then so be it."_

_Alex looked at Ryan. She wasn't sure what to make of his gesture, but if it meant that Marissa would spend less time with him, then she'd take it. Another wave of silence fell upon them. However, it wasn't as uncomfortable this time._

_Ryan decided to break the silence. "So I'm going to go. How much do I owe you for the water?"_

_"Don't worry about it. It's on me."_

_"Thanks." Alex simply nodded. "I'll see you around, Alex." _

_A truce was reached between them that night. Ryan was true to his word also. He stayed away from Marissa as much as he could without making her suspicious. He even spent some nights with __Alex__ at the Bait Shop on its s__lower nights. They both knew __that Marissa wouldn't think to look for him there-a fact that sadden__ed__ Alex. It was during one of these nights that Alex mentioned Taylor's interest in him. It wasn't long after that when they got together. It was also during these nights that they bonded...well, their version of bonding. They didn't talk much, but Alex appreciated what he was doing. And when he and Taylor got together, their friendship seemed inevitable. Taylor wouldn't accept her boyfriend and friend not being friends with each other. It was a little awkward at first, but eventually Alex found that hanging out with Ryan wasn't that bad. Plus, Taylor was always so upbeat and happy, and neither one of them wanted to be responsible for taking that away from her. Eventually, she found that she even had fun hanging out with her and Ryan. Of course, Alex chalked that up to Taylor's contagious personality.__ They finally had something else-someone else- in common besides Marissa._

_Ryan's little plan did work. Marissa actually did spend more time with Alex. She didn't even mind being Marissa's second choice. All that mattered was that she got to spend more time with the girl. Unfortunately, that didn't last too long. A few months later, she met her new friends, and everything just went __even further __downhill from there. _

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Alex shook herself from her thoughts. _I really have to stop spacing out._

"Alex, are you listening to me?" questioned Marissa.

"Of course."

Marissa looked at Alex skeptically and rolled her eyes. "Whatever." She walked towards Alex and put her hands on her waist. "So, my birthday's a little less than a month away," she said as she pulled Alex closer to her.

Alex tried to control her breathing. She missed the brunette, and having Marissa hold her so this close felt wonderful. "Yea, the big 1-8. You excited?"

"I guess," replied the brunette. Her eyes were downcast and she was playing with one of Alex's belt loops. "To be honest, I'm more excited about the party aspect of it." Marissa looked up to meet Alex's eyes. "You are throwing me a party, right?"

"I…."

"You mean, you're not?!" Marissa let go of Alex and went to sit on the desk. "That's just great!"

"Marissa, don't be mad-"

"Mad?" interrupted the brunette. "I'm not mad. I'm royally pissed!"

"Marissa, I just-"

"You just what?" shouted Marissa. "I mean, you're my girlfriend, Alex. You'd think my own girlfriend would want to celebrate my birthday, right? Of all the girls I had to end up with, I end up with the one that feels my birthday is not worthy of celebrating. That's just great. It's fucking fantastic, I tell ya!"

Alex mentally counted to ten. She was started to get slightly irritated, and the last thing she needed was to snap at Marissa when she was already pissed. "I just…."

"You said that already. You just what?!"

Alex let out a sigh. "I just wasn't sure if I'd see you." Alex noticed Marissa's face softening. "I figured you'd be spending it with Volchok and crew. I mean, I want to, and I've thought about it. I even thought about throwing you a surprise party, but I quickly threw that idea out the window. The possibility of getting you to spend the day with me so I could take you wasn't exactly high."

Marissa got up and started to walk towards Alex. She cupped one of her cheeks. "Of course, I'd want to spend it with you." Her voice was gentle. "You're my girlfriend, Alex. Who else would I want to spend it with?"

Alex's heart soared. This was the side of Marissa that she missed. She wished she could find a way to keep her this way. She leaned in and gave Marissa a kiss. Marissa deepened it instantly. She pushed Alex backwards until her back hit the door. Marissa's lips soon left Alex's, only to latch themselves to her neck. Alex let out a moan. She definitely missed this. She let her hands get lost in the brunette's hair. One of Marissa's hands found its way under Alex's shirt. Alex was too caught up in the sensations of Marissa's lips to notice this at first. It wasn't until she felt Marissa's hand cup one of her breast that she snapped back into reality. "Marissa," she panted, "we can't."

"But we can"

"Marissa…"

"Are you really going to tell me that you don't this?" Marissa pressed her body into Alex, causing her the blonde to moan once more. "That you don't want me?"

"Of course, I do. I just-"The blonde's words were cut off by Marissa's lips.

Somehow, Alex found the strength to pull her lips away from Marissa's. "Baby, we're packed tonight, and Mandy's out there all alone."

Marissa stepped back from Alex. "So you're here kissing your girlfriend and you have another girl on your mind?"

Alex took a step towards Marissa, but the brunette only took another step back. "Marissa, I want to, but I can't shake off my responsibilities. You saw how busy we are tonight. We can continue this after I get off work."

"Something tells me you won't be that lucky. I have to go. Appearances to make, people to see. Make sure my party doesn't suck." With that, Marissa walked past Alex without so much a glance her way. A second later, Alex heard the sound of her door being slammed-signifying the departure of her girlfriend. Alex stood in her office for another minute, composing herself. She felt her tears coming, but once again, she wouldn't let them be shed. After she felt composed enough, she took a deep breath. She opened her door and headed out-ready to face to long night ahead of her.


	5. Old Favorites

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**Thanks for the reviews. :)**

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It was early Sunday morning. The sun was barely starting to rise. Alex got off work only a few hours before. She knew she should probably be sleeping. The last two nights were busy to say the least. The fact that Alex was even _more_ sexually frustrated somehow only added to Alex's haggardness. Marissa was true to her word. When Alex got home Friday night…well, Saturday morning, she was surprised to find Marissa in bed. She was glad at first, thinking maybe they could finish what they started. Unfortunately, she was wrong. The brunette had claimed that she was too tired. Alex wasn't going to push, but she couldn't help but feel disappointed. With the state that she was in, she would've preferred Marissa not to be there at all. It was nothing short of torture to only be able to hold the girl in her arms when she was beyond aroused. Plus, Marissa's seemingly innocent touches throughout the night definitely didn't help things. It was like putting a starving man in a room full of food, but all he could do was just look at the food. Looking back now, Marissa probably did that on purpose. The blonde was almost certain she detected a hint of teasing when Marissa asked her how she slept. Luckily, for Alex, her level of sexual frustration has now died. Now, she was just her normal amount of being frustrated. 

She had gone home last night only to find Marissa wasn't home yet. However, Alex was too tired so she let it go. She sent the girl a text to make sure she was alright while she got ready for bed. She got one back shortly from Marissa, telling her that she was indeed fine. With that matter settled Alex went to lie down. She laid there for maybe an hour before she realized that sleep wasn't going to grace its presence. Her mind was just filled with too many things. She threw the covers back in frustration, and decided to do a little surfing.

Due to the lack of sunlight, Alex was little cold. She was only wearing a blue bikini that helped to accent her eyes. That didn't bother her in the least though. Standing on the sand and looking at the water now, Alex could feel herself become immersed with energy. The thought of surfing and being in the water prompted her second wind to kick in. She checked the time on her phone. She could get in a good couple of hours of surfing before she had to go to brunch. The blonde decided to not waste another minute. There wasn't anyone else out this early, and she wanted to take full advantage. And she did.

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Alex had been surfing for nearly three hours. She couldn't believe that she let so much time pass since she was last in the water. There something about the water that soothed her, rejuvenated her. She made a promise to herself to try to get in the water more. Unfortunately, she knew that her time was running out. She took on one last wave before she called it quits.

The first thing Alex did when she was back on the shore was check the time. It was a little before 10. She had about an hour to get ready for her brunch date. She gathered her things and walked back home. She found Marissa asleep in their bed. The blonde took a moment to let the sight sink in. She loved watching Marissa sleep. She always seemed so calm and at peace and that in turn made Alex feel the same way. The vibration of her phone brought her out of her trance. She gazed at Marissa a bit longer before she answered it. "Hello?" she whispered, not wanting to wake the sleeping beauty. She partially closed the bedroom door and made her way to the kitchen.

"Alex! How you doing girl?" asked a booming voice.

Recognizing the voice, Alex couldn't help but smile. "Hey Jodie. I'm good, and you?"

"I'm great," answered Jodie, "but I'll be even greater in a few hours."

"Why's that?"

"Cause that's when I'll be over."

"Really?" Alex was ecstatic. It had been too long since she's seen Jodie.

"Yep," replied the Latina. "I've taken some time off. I thought I'd visit my favorite person."

"That's great, Jodie. I'm excited!"

"Excited enough to let me crash there?" Jodie asked hopefully. She knew Alex wouldn't mind. It was Marissa that she was worried about. Supposedly she was fine with hers and Alex's continued friendship. However, there were times when Jodie questioned that fact. She didn't expect Marissa to be her best friend or anything. In fact, she wasn't even sure if she wanted a friendship with Marissa at all, especially with the way she's been treating Alex. Still, Jodie didn't want to cross any lines with Alex. She knew that Alex loved Marissa. How she could possibly be still in love with that Newport princess was beyond Jodie's comprehension. When she felt brave enough, Jodie even questioned Alex as to why she stays. Her answer was always the same. "I love her," she'd tell Jodie. It broke her heart to think about the day when Alex will finally be able to admit to herself that Marissa doesn't love her back.

"I'll have to double check with Marissa-"

"So that's a no then."

"Jodie," sighed the blonde. She knew that it was going to be tough to convince Marissa to let Jodie stay with them. Maybe if it was for a day or two, but a few weeks….Alex wasn't looking forward to that conversation.

"Sorry, Al." Jodie hated putting Alex in the middle of things.

"Look, I have to get ready for this brunch thing I'm having-"

"Alex Kelly does brunch?" teased the girl. "Who knew?"

"Ha ha. I'm meeting with Marissa's mom, sister, and Summer to plan her birthday party. Hey, you'll be able to come! That's awesome!"

"Yeah, I'm sure that'll be the best present ever for Marissa." Jodie couldn't help but make her sarcasm evident. She regretted it instantly when she heard Alex sighing again. "I'm sorry, Al"

"It's okay, but I really do have to get ready. I'll talk to Marissa afterwards though, ok? Then, we can hang. It's my day off so we'll have the whole night upon us."

"Sounds great Alex. I'll see you in a few hours then."

"Alright, by Jodie." Alex hung up, no longer feeling quite as rejuvenated. She was glad that Jodie was coming, but Marissa's reaction was definitely not something she was looking forward to. Gone was her sense of ease, as it was replaced with that familiar feeling of constant tribulation and apprehension. She glanced at her phone and saw the time. She decided to put those thoughts on hold since she really needed to get ready. Julie Cooper was not someone she wanted to keep waiting.


	6. Twice

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Thanks for the reviews!**

* * *

A freshly showered Alex sat waiting for the rest of her party to arrive. She was able to shower and change without waking up Marissa. She did it as quietly as possible. Although, Alex probably could've made a loud ruckus and the lanky girl probably still wouldn't so much as stir. Chances were she was beyond passed out. Before she left, Alex couldn't help but give her a quick kiss on her forehead. She also left her a note telling her where she'd be and that she really needed to talk to her later. She taped it to her phone, knowing that there was no way she could miss it.

Looking around her, Alex was starting to second guess her attire. The restaurant wasn't extremely fancy, but it was enough to make her wish she'd worn something else besides jeans and a shirt. Her shirt was slightly dressy, but it was still a shirt nonetheless. Julie Cooper wasn't even here yet, and Alex could already feel her disapproval.

"Alex! How are you?" came an excited voice.

The blonde let out a chuckle. She could recognize that voice anywhere. No one could misplace the voice, sometimes shriek, of Summer Roberts. Alex gave her wave. Following Summer were the Cooper ladies, minus one of course. All three girls took their seats. "Hey Summer, how are you?"

"Excited!" beamed the short brunette. "I'm so excited! This is going to be so much fun. I have so many ideas-you don't even know."

Alex only shook her head. She was grateful that Taylor decided to opt out in this adventure. It wasn't that she didn't want to help. She just felt the task was more designed for the four of them. Besides, who would know Marissa better than her family, best friend, and girlfriend? Alex liked Summer and Taylor, but the both of them at the same time was just too much sometimes. "I have no doubt that they're all great ideas. Kaitlyn, Julie….how you guys?"

"Honestly, Alex, don't you own anything else besides jeans and t-shirts?" blurted out Julie.

"Mom! Leave Alex alone. She looks great." Kaitlin said. Alex gave her an appreciative smile.

"I didn't mean it in a bad way," stated Julie. "I'm just saying….it wouldn't hurt to change things up a bit."

Eventually, Julie accepted Alex as being a part of Marissa's life. She wasn't completely happy about it, but she was longer against it either. She even tried to be nice to Alex on occasion. Of course, it was done in a Julie Cooper-esque way, so often times it didn't come across as nice. Her relationship with Marissa was gradually improving. They still weren't exactly close, but Julie decided to not interfere in Marissa's life as much. It wasn't always easy, but Marissa moving out was a pretty bold statement on her part. Julie didn't want to test just how bold her oldest daughter could be.

"Ladies, what can I get you?" asked their waiter. The girls placed their order, and started to discuss the details of Marissa's big party. They were still in discussion when their food arrived. They took a moment to thank their waiter, and then they went to back to discuss the business at hand, while enjoying their food.

"So that pretty much takes care of the little things." Alex said. "Let's get on to the bigger stuff, like location."

"We could do it at the house," offered Julie.

"Somehow, I don't think Marissa's going to go for that," replied the youngest Cooper.

"What-it's still her house too, even if she doesn't live there anymore."

Alex couldn't help but feel uncomfortable by that statement. Kaitlyn noticed this. "Mom! Can you _try_ to be a little more considerate?"

"What did I say?" asked Julie.

"It's nothing," replied Alex.

"How about the Bait Shop?" suggested Summer. She looked at Alex. "Do you think we could use it for the night? I mean, it's only like _the_ perfect place."

"I don't know," answered Alex. "Marissa's birthday falls on a Saturday. That's one of our busier nights. I don't know if Nat will close it to the public."

"Please," interjected Julie, "he'll close it if I tell him to. No one says no to Julie Cooper."

"It's probably going to be expensive," Alex said. "I mean, he's probably going to charge you an arm and a leg…." Alex stopped when she saw the look that Julie was giving. It was almost an insulted look. If it was possible, Alex forgot that it Julie Cooper she was talking to. Money wasn't exactly scarce for her. "Right….never mind then."

"What about music?" asked Kaitlyn. "Should we have a band? Hire a DJ?"

An idea popped into Alex's head. "I've got that covered. Decorations?"

"Oh, that's all me!" chimed Summer. "I'll handle the invites too!"

"Well, it looks like we've covered all our bases," Alex said. "Should something else come up, we'll discuss it as it comes.

The four girls enjoyed the rest of their meal quite nicely. Summer hogged most of the conversation, telling them about her ideas. No one dared to interrupt her. About an hour later they started to wrap things up. "Thanks for helping me with this," Alex said as she was taking out some money from her purse.

Julie went to stop her. "I got this, Alex."

"I appreciate the offer Julie, but it's not necessary."

"Really, Alex-it's no big deal."

The fact that Alex wasn't financially able to support Marissa was no secret. Still, she wanted to prove to Julie that was more than capable of taking care of herself. She appreciated Julie's offer-she really did. But the need to prove her financial capabilities to Julie was too great. It was bad enough she was footing the bill for Marissa's party. Alex had offered to help pay when she called Julie about their meeting. Julie just shot her down. She said that it was her motherly duty. Alex tried arguing the point, but when she felt that Julie was really started to get pissed, she backed off. "Please, Julie," Alex pleaded, "please let me pay for myself."

Julie saw the look of determination in Alex's eyes. She knew Alex wasn't going to give in this time. She hadn't meant to insult or upset the blonde, but it seems that she'd done just that. "Okay, if that's what you want."

"Thank you," replied Alex. "I hate to run off, but there's something I need to take care of. Thanks again." The blonde gave each one of them a grateful look and was off.

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Alex rushed home, in hopes of catching Marissa before she was off to god knows where again. "Marissa?" Alex called out as she made her way through the apartment. There was no answer. She was beginning to think that Marissa had already left. The blonde went to check the bedroom. She was surprised to find the brunette still asleep. The note that she left was right where she left it also. _She must be really exhausted…..or wasted. Great._ The blonde thought about letting Marissa sleep a bit more, but she really needed to talk to her about Jodie. She sat down beside Marissa on the bed. "Marissa, wake up," attempted Alex. No luck. She used her hand to gently shake the girl awake. "Marissa, get up. I need to talk to you about something." The brunette murmured something, but Alex couldn't make out what she had said. She went to tuck a strand of hair that had fallen over the lanky girl's face. This only caused Marissa to swat her hand away. Alex shook her gently once more. "Baby….you really need to get up." Alex moved her hand to Marissa's back and started to gently rub while still trying to get her wake up.

"Stop touching me, Volchok," Marissa growled, her eyes remaining shut. Alex's hand froze. Thoughts of this Volchok guy putting his hands on _her_ girlfriend angered the blonde. The possibility of Marissa being unfaithful never really crossed Alex's mind...well, not since Ryan. She certainly never thought Marissa would hook up with him. If anything, there was a small part of Alex that still thought Marissa harbored feelings for Ryan. She didn't know why really, but it wasn't like the brunette really did anything to show Alex that there was no one else on her mind. No one else in her heart. Alex took a deep breath and once again tried to wake Marissa. She was caught off guard when Marissa suddenly bolted upright.

"Damn it, Volchok! Keep your hands-" Marissa stopped herself when she realized that it was Alex that was trying to wake her. She couldn't hide her confusion. "Alex? What are you doing here?"

"What are you talking about Marissa?" Marissa looked around her surroundings. It took a minute, but she realized that she was home. "Jesus, Marissa! Were you so wasted that you don't even remember getting home this morning?"

"I guess…." Marissa shook her head. "Why are you waking me up this early?"

"Early? Marissa, it's past noon."

"On a Sunday-people sleep in on Sundays." Marissa went to lie back down.

"Marissa, don't go back to sleep. There's something I need to discuss with you."

The brunette let out an impatient sigh. "Can't it wait Al? I'm tired."

"Marissa, please" pleaded Alex.

Another impatient sigh was heard from brunette. "Fine, what is it?"

"Jodie's coming to visit." Alex stated.

Marissa's eyes shot open. She looked at Alex as she got back into a sitting position. She tried to hide the contempt in her voice. "Is that so? When?"

"Uh," hesitated the blonde, "probably an hour or two."

"What! Honestly, Alex couldn't you give a little bit more warning than that?" Marissa wasn't really mad at Alex. She just really wasn't in the mood for Jodie. Then again, she never was.

"I just found out this morning. She's going to be here for a few weeks. She'll be here for your birthday."

"That's just awesome."

Alex chose to ignore the sarcasm in Marissa's voice. "Be nice. She's actually going to dj for your party. It's her birthday present for you."

"She _really_ doesn't have to do that for me. I don't want to put her out."

"Nonsense. She really wants to do it." _At least, I hope so. _"Plus, she's really great at it. Let her do it. Please."

Marissa gave the blonde a skeptical look. She didn't want Jodie anywhere near her party, or Alex. "Fine," she relented. A strange look graced her face.

"What is it?" asked Alex, concerned.

"Where is she staying?"

"Uh…well….she…." stammered Alex.

Marissa's eyes went wide. "No! No way!"

"Marissa, come on. She's coming all this way to see me. I can't just-"

"Alex, where is she going to sleep?" interrupted Marissa. The couch isn't all that comfortable. That really wouldn't be fair to her. She should have a comfortable bed, a comfortable hotel bed. Hell, I'd even pay for it." She would've done anything if it meant that Jodie wasn't going to stay with them.

"She's not going to accept that. Plus, she really wants to stay here. She was the one that asked. I thought you were fine with Jodie."

"I am," lied the brunette. "I'm just trying to make her stay more comfortable for her. I mean, a few weeks is a long time to sleep on an uncomfortable couch."

"She'll be fine," insisted Alex.

Marissa knew that there was no way she could keep protesting without upsetting the blonde. She knew that Alex wasn't that oblivious to her feelings towards the Latina. The last thing she wanted to do was anger her girlfriend. It'd give Jodie too much satisfaction. "Whatever. It's her back. However, she's _not_ allowed in this bed."

Alex was confused. "Of course, why would she-"

"I mean for _any_ reason," Marissa interrupted. "I don't care if she comes here one day during the afternoon and wants to take a nap-she won't be taking it on _this _bed. I don't want to hear any lame excuse like how she accidently feel asleep. This is _our_ bed and ours alone. Got it?"

"Yea, of course," answered the blonde. "So…."

"Fine, but you owe me."

Alex was beyond happy. Without thought, she pulled Marissa towards her and started to plant quick kisses up on her. "Thank….you….so….much!" she said in between kisses. She topped it off with one final kiss. It was still relatively short, but also slightly more passionate.

Alex's outburst was so unexpected that it took a second for Marissa to respond to the kiss. She couldn't help but feel a bit put off that Jodie, her ex, was the cause of Alex's elated state. Her thoughts were quickly put aside when she realized that Alex was started to get out of bed. "Where are you going?" she asked, stopping the now smiling blonde's action.

"To get things ready and run a few errands before Jodie comes. We have so much to catch up on."

Marissa supposed she should've been happy for Alex. The fact that she was sporting a smile that went on for miles should've put a smile on her own face. It made her ill. "Well, _Jodie_ is going to have to wait a bit. I want to get more sleep. Since you're the one woke me from my peaceful slumber, it's only fair you help me return to it." She scooted closer to the blonde. "The only problem is I'm wide awake now." She crawled onto Alex's lap so that she was straddling her. Marissa brought her face close to her girlfriend's. They were just barley touching. "What are you going to do fix that?" Marissa's voice had dropped a few octaves-something turned the blonde on instantly. Marissa didn't bother to wait for an answer. She attacked Alex's lips hungrily. Marissa ran her hands down Alex's side and placed her hands inside her shirt.

The feel of Marissa's hands on her bare skin made Alex moan into her mouth. Her hands explored the blonde's skin. In an instant later, Marissa had rid Alex of her shirt. She cupped one of her breasts, giving it playful squeezes. Alex pulled her lips away from Marissa's and let out another moan. Marissa took that opportunity to push aside Alex's bra and latched her mouth onto Alex's other breast. The blonde arched into her mouth. She had one hand buried in the lanky girl's hair and the other was gripping her hip. It had been so long that the mere act of Marissa devouring her breast could probably bring her over the edge. Suddenly, something came over the blonde.

Marissa felt that something was off with Alex. She removed herself from the blonde's breast and looked up at Alex. The look of concern and apprehension that she saw in her eyes had her a bit worried herself. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing. I just…." Alex was having trouble finishing her sentence.

Marissa cradled her face in her hands. "What is it?" When she didn't receive an immediate answer, her initial worry was replaced with anger. "You have got to be kidding me!" She saw Alex getting ready to say something, but she stopped her before she could. "You're turning me down? Again?! That's great. Well, maybe I'll get lucky on my third try." She started to get off the blonde, but she was held in place. "Let me go Alex."

Alex kept her gripped on the girl. She had no intentions of denying Marissa. She had no intentions of denying _herself._ However, in a sense, Marissa said it herself. _Again._ Alex could scarcely remember the last time they slept together. Now, in less than a week, Marissa had tried…_twice._ The simple fact that maybe Marissa just wanted to be intimate with her never crossed her mind. The truth of the matter was that Alex was worried that something was up with Marissa. Then, she recalled the brunette saying Volchok's name in her sleep. She felt her body tense up. "Marissa….," she started, "are you okay?"

"Am I okay?" scoffed Marissa. "Let's see….my girlfriend has turned me down for sex again. I'm anything _but_ okay."

"When I was trying to wake you earlier, you said Volchok's name."

"And…."

Alex took a breath. "Well, you said for him to stop touching you, and-"

Marissa was outraged. She untangled herself from Alex's arms before the blonde could stop her. She went to stand at the foot of the bed. With a hand on her hip, she gave Alex a menacing glare. "I would advise you to choose your next words carefully," she threatened.

Alex wasn't exactly sure of the reason behind's Marissa's sudden animosity, but she didn't let that derail her. She got off the bed and slowly made her way towards the irate brunette. "Look, Marissa, I just want to know if-"

"If what," she interrupted, nearly screaming, "if I cheated on you? First Ryan, and now him. Honestly, Alex can I not have guy friends anymore?"

"I'm not accusing you of cheating," Alex replied. "I just….I just want to make sure he hasn't tried to….to…." Alex looked down at the carpet. She couldn't bring herself to look at Marissa.

Marissa realized what the blonde was getting at. She went to take the girl in her arms. She placed her finger under Alex's chin and brought up her face. "No. I mean, he's a little too touchy feely sometimes for my taste, but it's all harmless. He's never really tried anything….and neither have I."

"Do you want to?"


	7. Never Right

"Do you want to?" The questioned came out before she could stop it. She closed her eyes and braced herself for Marissa's angry rants. Surprisingly, it didn't come. She slowly opened her eyes. She found herself looking into Marissa's eyes. There was a hint of sadness and hurt to them. She cursed herself for being the reason for them.

Marissa went to sit on the edge of the bed. "I'd never cheat on you. I know that I've lied, but I would never cheat. I wish you'd believe me." The last part was barely a whisper, but Alex heard it.

She went to sit next to Marissa. She kept her eyes focused on the floor. "I'm sorry. I know you wouldn't."

"Do you? Do you really?"

Alex looked up to face Marissa. There were tears forming around the brunette's eyes. They stared at each other for a while. She really didn't think Marissa would cheat on her. However, a part of her wondered if the girl wanted to. If she wanted out. Their stare down was broken when Alex saw a single tear fall down her girlfriend's cheek. She went to wipe it. Cupping her cheek, she said, "I do. I just….I just can't help but feel you want to sometimes. Marissa, if you….if you ever want out-"

"Are you saying you do?" The brunette felt herself starting to panic.

"No." Alex took a breath. "Why are you with me? Why do you stay?" These were questions she wasn't sure she'd want the answer to. Alex barely let herself ponder them, let alone ask them out loud. Yet, she found herself needed to know the answers more than ever now. "Why do continue to say and be with me when-"

"When what?"

"When you don't want to…..when you don't want me." Alex dropped her hands from Marissa's face, but she kept her gaze. Marissa kept silent. The longer she kept silent, the more Alex felt like she was dying. "I love you, Marissa. There's nothing more I want than to be with you, but only if that's what _you_ want also. Be with me because you _want_ to be with me. Any other reason just won't do."

Marissa wanted to reach out to the blonde. She wanted to hold her soothe her worries. Something stopped her though. She replaced the need to soothe Alex with anger. She got up abruptly and quickly. She took a couple of steps and turned to face the blonde. The look shock and sadness on Alex's face almost made her loose her resolve….almost. "Are you trying to get rid of me? Now that the great Jodie is in town, you want me out of the picture so you can do whatever with her?"

"What? No!"

"That's your plan, isn't it? Then, on top of that, you go and try to make _me_ feel guilty. That's rich, Alex." Marissa knew that wasn't Alex's intention. She felt bad for accusing her, but she needed to take the attention off herself. She couldn't trust her actions if she didn't. She needed this conversation to be over and done with, and she knew just how to make it so.

Alex felt like she was going in circles. Nothing she did or said seems to be right. She felt mentally drained. "You know that's not what I'm doing. I've given you no reasons to doubt my love for you."

"And I have, is that it?"

Alex wasn't going to fall into that trap. She didn't have it in her to go another round with Marissa. She needed some air. She got up and made her way towards the door. Her actions were halted by Marissa.

The lanky girl used her body to block Alex's exit. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Marissa, I can't do this right now. Let's just forget I said anything alright? I don't want to fight with you anymore."

The lanky girl was glad that the subject was dropped. However, she noticed that Alex was still trying to get past her. Again, she stopped her. "Let me ask you again: where are you going?"

"I'm just going out for a bit. I need some air." The two stared at each other. Every move Alex made was followed by Marissa mirroring the action. Alex was started to get annoyed.

A smile crept over Marissa's face. Before the blonde could wonder why it was there, she felt Marissa kissing her. Alex was determined not to return it, but then Marissa's hand slid down her side and grabbed her ass. The moan left the blonde's mouth before she could stop it. Marissa took advantage of it and stuck her tongue in the other girl's mouth. Alex's determination was lost after that. The two kissed passionately and hungrily. Alex wasn't too sure how long they were at it before she broke the kiss. "Marissa…"

"If you want air, we'll open a window." Marissa was pushing Alex towards the bed. She kissed the girl's neck and played with the hem of her shirt along the way.

Alex was finding it difficult to breathe. Her body responded instantly to Marissa's touch. Before she knew it, Marissa had rid her of her shirt and was attempting to do the same with her bra. Then that was gone. Her senses seemed to be on overload and the mere feeling of Marissa's hands on her bare skin was almost too much. She needed to touch her, to be in her. She went to unbutton the brunette's jeans. Marissa stopped her and pushed her onto the bed.

The brunette stood there for a bit, taking in the sight of the topless blonde. Alex couldn't stand the separation anymore. She got up to grab her girlfriend. Marissa mistook Alex getting up as a sign of her not wanting to continue. She pushed her onto the bed once more, and crawled on top of her. She stopped when their faces were mere centimeters apart. Alex's breathing was heavy. Marissa moved her head to the side and nibbled on the blonde's earlobe. Alex moaned in response and gripped Marissa's sides. "Don't even think of leaving," whispered Marissa. She left a trail of kisses down Alex's neck and chest. She stopped when she reached the valley between the blonde's breasts. She heard Alex take in sharp breath. Marissa looked into her blue eyes. With a throaty voice she said, "You owe me, remember? It's time to make it up to me." With that, Marissa dipped her head and took one of Alex's breasts into her mouth, robbing Alex of any ability to think or speak clearly. Gone were the memories of the fight they had not five minutes ago. The only thing on the blonde's mind was feeling and tasting Marissa. And that's what she did.

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**Sorry, it took me a while to get this up. I was having issues writing it. What I had in mind seemed to clash with what actually got written. Sorry if it sucks. Again, thanks for all the feedback.**


	8. Territories

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. **

**Thanks again for the reviews! **

* * *

Marissa was on her side watching her girlfriend sleep. Occasionally, she had to stop herself from reaching out and touching her. It's not that she didn't want to. She just didn't want to risk waking up the slumbering blonde. She loved watching Alex sleep. She loved the sound of her deep breathing, the sight of her chest rising and falling. There was no denying that Alex Kelly was hot and incredibly sexy. However, she was also so beautiful. Many would argue that it's the same thing. Marissa didn't think so. Someone's sexiness was only skin deep, but beauty was so much more. Even on her roughest day, Alex is still the most beautiful thing Marissa has ever seen. When she was asleep her beauty seemed to be enhanced.

Marissa continued to gaze at the blonde. She felt her hand itching with the need to touch Alex again. She balled up her hand and mentally shook herself. She needed to keep herself in check. Alex probably needed the nap. At that thought, Marissa felt the feeling of sadness wash over her. Alex was only 18. Was she out having fun like she should? No. She was working her ass off. The brunette couldn't help but wish Alex wouldn't work so hard. Alex needed to enjoy what was left her youth, not spend it working. She's just too young to have so many responsibilities. She offered to pay her share, but Alex wouldn't hear of it. It had actually seemed to propel her to work even harder. She wanted to prove to the world, to her girlfriend, that she could do it. Marissa just wished Alex would realize that she had nothing to prove to her. All the blonde had to do was love her.

The sound of a phone ringing brought Marissa out her thoughts. She got out of bed as quickly as possible and went to search for the phone. She didn't want its ringing to wake up Alex. When she found the phone, Marissa realized that it was Alex's phone and not hers. She checked the caller ID and decided to answer it. "Hey Sum."

"Coop?" asked a confused brunette. "I thought I dialed Alex's number."

"You did. She's sleeping though. I didn't want to wake her. So what's up?"

"Taylor's been nagging me about having a get together. She claims it's been too long. It'd be annoying if I didn't agree with her. So when are you free?"

"I don't know, Sum-""If you're going to give me some bullshit excuse about how you're too busy, I am going to hurt you," threatened Summer. "If you can find times to hang out with Volchok, you can find time for me. You _will_ find time for me. Alex may let you get off the hook for blowing her off, but I won't. I don't care if I have to drag you. We are going to have this triple date whether you like it or not!"

"Alright, alright. Breathe Summer. How about Thursday? We could do dinner. I'd have to double check with Alex, but I don't think she's working that night."

"Thursday sounds great!" exclaimed the now much happier brunette. "I'll work out the details. You just make sure your ass is there."

"I'll be there. Just so you know, Jodie might be there too."

Summer picked up on the unpleasantness in Marissa's voice when she mentioned Jodie. "She's in town?"

"She should be here soon. Apparently, she's going to DJ my party."

"Oh. Well, that's fine. She's more than welcomed. Well, I gotta go. Tell Alex I said hi, and I'll talk to you later. Bye Coop!" Summer hung up the phone thinking these upcoming weeks should be interesting.

Marissa closed Alex's phone and went to get back into bed. When turned around, she saw that Alex had woken up. She made her way into the bed. "Hey."

"Hey"

Marissa gave Alex an apologetic look. "Was I talking too loud?"

"No, it was the ringing that woke me up."

"Sorry." The blonde just shrugged, indicating that it wasn't a big deal. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I didn't want to interrupt you. Plus…" Alex pulled Marissa closer to her. Her hand was traveling her backside. "I had an amazing view of your ass." The blonde gave Marissa's ass a squeeze as she said that.

This caused Marissa to moan. "Oh yea?" she asked huskily.

"Yea."

"You know," Marissa said as she went to straddle the blonde, "you were supposed to wear _me _out. _I'm _the one whose sleep got interrupted, remember?" She leaned down and gave Alex's neck a lick before she started to suck on her pulse point.

"S-Sorry" stuttered the blonde. "I didn't mean to-oh god!" Marissa's hand had found itself on one of Alex's breasts. The blonde's breathing increased. "I didn't mean to fall asleep on you. Long night."

Marissa stopped sucking on Alex's next, but her hand was still working its magic on her breast. She gave Alex a quick kiss on her lips. "That's okay. However, this does mean you're going to have to try again." Marissa then proceeded to give Alex a passionate kiss.

Alex moaned into the kiss and wasted no time in returning it. Her hands went to give the brunette's ass another squeeze as she deepened the kiss. Marissa grinded her body into Alex's. The blonde broke the kiss and let out a loud moan. "Marissa…."

Alex's words were interrupted by the sound of someone knocking on the door. Marissa grunted. "Ignore it."

"That's probably Jodie."

"So?" Alex gave Marissa a pleading look. "Fine. You stay here and I'll get it." The knocking insisted. "I'm coming!" She got out of bed and hastily put her clothes on. She made her way towards the bedroom door, but turned around before she passed the threshold. "Make sure that you are _fully_ clothed before you come out."

"Awww, but I wanted to walk around naked for a bit. I haven't done that in a while," teased Alex. Marissa simply just glared at her. "I'm kidding, jeez."

"Fully clothed," repeated Marissa. Then she went to open the door.

"Hey Al-oh it's you," replied Jodie.

"Jodie."

"Marissa." The two just stood there for a while, having a little stare down.

"Hey-are you just going to stand there all day or come in?" questioned a voice.

Jodie looked over Marissa and saw her best friend standing in the middle of the living room. "Al!" She pushed her past Marissa and let herself in. Marissa balled up her fists in an effort not to push the Latina back. She went to shut the door and turned around to the sight of Alex and Jodie hugging. She'd be lying if she didn't say the sight bothered her. It wasn't that she was afraid of losing Alex to her. She just didn't like Jodie. Never had. Chances were, she never would.

"Oh my god Jodie! It's been too long," exclaimed the blonde as their hug ended.

"I know! Don't worry cause I'm here for a while. You'll probably sick of me by then."

"I already am," mumbled Marissa.

"What was that, baby?" asked Alex.

"Nothing." She told Alex she'd be nice, so she was going to try. She just wasn't going to try too hard. Marissa plastered on a fake smile. "It's great to have you here, Jodie."

Jodie donned a fake smile herself. "Thanks." She scrunched up her nose. "Ewwww Alex! You reek of sex! You couldn't shower before you touched me?" Then she noticed a small mark on the blonde's neck. "A hickey?" She turned her towards Marissa. "Marking your territory?"

Marissa's fake smile turned into a genuine smug one. "Of course not. I can't help it if my girlfriend is so hot and...great in bed.

"Sure. I mean, I had issues keeping my hands off her too. Not that I could if I wanted to. She was insatia-"

"So how about we get you settled in Jodie?" interrupted the blonde. She saw the look on Marissa's face and really didn't want a fight breaking out in her apartment.

"Good idea Al. Help me?"

"Of course"

"Well, let's get started." Jodie placed her arm around Alex's shoulder and guided her towards the door. As they passed Marissa, the two brunettes had another little stare down as Alex went to open the door.

Marissa watched as the two made their way towards Jodie's car. She watched how Jodie still had her arm around _her_ girlfriend's shoulders. A million thoughts of hurting the Latina bombarded her mind. She just hoped she could prevent herself from acting upon them. Although if she kept touching Alex, all hell may just break loose.

* * *

** Sorry, I know it wasn't much, but it will get better. I promise.**


	9. Boredom

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Sorry, it's taken so long. This is just a little filler. The next update will be up in the next day or two...if not sooner.**

* * *

"Watch out!"

That was the last thing Alex heard before she felt the wind being knocked out of her. If it weren't for her office door, she'd probably be kissing the floor now.

"Oh god, I'm sorry Alex!" exclaimed Jodie. The Latina immediately stepped back to give the blonde some room. The sight of her friend trying to catch her breath added to her guilt. "Al?"

Alex held up her finger, indicating to the brunette to give her a minute. "What the hell Jodie?" came the annoyed blonde's response a few minutes later.

"Sorry Al. Mandy was chasing me. I was going to hide in your office. I turned my head to look back at Mandy. When I turned it back, you were there, and I couldn't-

"So this is my fault?"

"What? No, it's just-"

"Why was Mandy chasing you?"

"Uh….well….," stammered the brunette, "I kind of kissed her."

Alex arched her eyebrow. "Why?"

Jodie shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. Boredom. I didn't think she'd freak out on me."

"Jodie, she's straight."

"I know, but you've kissed her," countered Jodie.

"To prove a point!"

"I know. Trust me. I won't repeat that mistake. So are you okay?"

"Oh just fine….if you don't count the fact that my back is now killing me," Alex answered sarcastically.

"Sorry."

Alex let out a sigh. "I know. It's not a big deal, but I've got to get going."

"Where to?"

"I'm having lunch with Marissa at her school."

This intrigued Jodie's interest, which didn't go unnoticed by the blonde. "Really. Why doesn't she just meet you here then? I mean, doesn't she usually. Oh wait, let me guess. It's because I'm here, right?"

"Jodie….." For the most part, Marissa and Jodie have been pretty civil towards each other. Then again, it's not like Alex expected them to incessantly go at it either. She had to admit that she was also surprised at Marissa's suggestion to have lunch with her at her school. Marissa didn't hide the fact that she was dating a girl, but at the same time, she didn't go around telling anyone that'd listen. So Alex wasn't really worried about Marissa's public image. It was just that she couldn't recall the last time Marissa had invited her.

"Just face the fact that she doesn't like you alone with me. She thinks I'm going to jump your bones or something. Please. As if you'd be so lucky."

Alex smiled, glad that Jodie was going to let it go. "Whatever. You know you can't resist me."

"Shhhh! Careful. Your girlfriend might have her spies around." The blonde just rolled her eyes. "Hey-that dinner is tonight too. Wow. She must really think I want you or something."

"Right. You know, you're invited to the dinner too."

"That's okay. Your girl can have you today. I'm actually glad she's taking you for most of the day. I can only take so much of your constant begging to have me."

Alex shook her head as she began to walk towards the exit. "I'll see you when I get back. Try not to get bored again while I'm gone."


	10. Old Times

**Disclaimer: I own nothing**

**Thanks for the reviews...and your patience.**

**QueenForANight**-I wasn't intentionally going for House-like behavior for Jodie, but I definitely don't mind that it came off that way for you. I **LOVE** House also. Nice to meet a fellow fan.

* * *

"Alex, we're going to be late!"

"I know, I know. Just let me grab a quick shower, and then we're out of here."

"We don't have time," said the brunette.

Alex gave Marissa an incredulous look. "I'm sorry. I guess we haven't met. I'm Alex, queen of short showers" Alex stuck out her hand. "Nice to meet you."

Marissa rolled her eyes and playfully swatted away the blonde's hand. "Just hurry your ass up!"

Alex gave her a salute and made her way into the shower.

True to her title, the blonde was out in record time. "How's that for fast?" boasted Alex.

"Here," Marissa handed her some clothes, "I picked out some clothes for you.

Alex took them and gave them a look. Marissa had picked out a short denim skirt and a black tank top. "Wow, you must really not want to be late."

Marissa simply shrugged her shoulders. "I just don't really feel like hearing it from Summer. Then Taylor will join in, and I'd rather not suffer through all that. So…any chance I can convince you to wear one of my flip flops?" Marissa gave a hopeful smile.

"Uh…" started the blonde.

"C'mon. It's not like you haven't before. Besides, you look great when you go all girly-girl like."

"I'll never hear the end of it from Jodie." Marissa just gave her a "who cares" look. "Next time?"

The brunette gave a dramatic sigh. "Fine. Go to your chucks. Now hurry up and get dressed before we're late. I'll wait for you out there." Marissa turned to leave, but her actions were halted when she felt a hand grab her and pull her backwards. She stood face to face with Alex. "Al, what are-"

The blonde interrupted her with a kiss. It started out simple enough, but it wasn't long before she deepened it.

The brunette barley had a chance to fully enjoy the kiss before Alex abruptly ended. Still, it was enough to leave her breathless. "What was that for?"

"For lunch today."

"Lunch?"

"Mm-hmm." Nothing special had happened during their lunch. Still, just being there at Marissa's school amongst her peers was enough. "I really enjoyed it."

Marissa couldn't deny that she was confused, but decided not to focus on it. She wrapped her arms around Alex's neck. "You know," she started seductively, "we could always skip dinner." She leaned in and started placing kisses on the blonde's neck, causing her to moan.

"What about…Summer and h-her rantings?" The blonde was struggling to form complete sentences. "D-do you really…really want to anger…her?"

Marissa let out a sigh. "We must really work on your thinking about other girls when I kiss you. However, you're right." She gave Alex one last passionate kiss and proceeded to walk out the bedroom. "Snap out of your daze and get dressed already. We are going to be late!"

They had decided to just have dinner at the pier. Alex and Marissa made it there on time, but still, they were the last to arrive.

"Coop! Finally!" exaggerated Summer. "Could you have taken any longer? I mean, it's bad enough that we hardly hang out anymore. Do you have to keep us waiting too? I took the liberty to go ahead and order your drinks. Your welcome."

Marissa rolled her eyes and gave Alex an "I told you so" look. "Sorry Sum. Alex just _had_ to have a shower. Then she tried having her way with me. I told her we didn't have enough time, but she just wasn't having it."

"Hey!" exclaimed the blonde. "I did not."

"Coop, could you please spare me the details of your sex life?" stated the short brunette.

"Oh please don't spare me," said Seth. "I want all the details. If you have pictures that'd be-OW!"

"Hello your girlfriend is sitting right next to you!" said Summer. Seth simply shrugged his shoulders and mumbled sorry.

Alex mentally shook her head at Seth's comment. She was about to say hi to Ryan and Taylor when she noticed that Taylor looked as if she was about to explode. "Are you okay Taylor?"

Everyone turned their attention to Taylor. She looked at everyone quickly before settling on Ryan. Ryan took her hands in his and gave it a loving squeeze. "Go ahead," he encouraged.

"I got into Berkley!" the brunette squealed. A myriad of congratulations were offered to her.

"When did you find out?" Alex asked.

"This morning," replied Taylor. "As soon as I saw the letter, I called Ryan. He was actually the one that read it. I was too nervous."

"That's an understatement," Ryan added. "I'm surprised the whole world didn't hear scream for joy."

"Hey," Taylor pouted and gave him a playful nudge. "I wasn't _that_ loud."

"If you say so sweetie," Ryan said. "You had every right to be loud though. I'm so proud of you."

"Yea, we all are," added Alex.

"Thanks you guys," Taylor said gratefully. "You know, Alex, you could've applied too. Who knows-maybe you still can."

This got Marissa's attention. "What are you talking about Taylor? I think all the excitement's gone to your head. My Alex here is a dropout, remember?"

Alex knew Marissa hadn't meant anything by it, but her words still hurt. She gave Taylor a look, pleading with her eyes for her to drop it. This wasn't missed by Marissa. "Is there something I don't know?"

Alex turned her face towards Marissa. She was trying to come up with something to say when she saw the waiter coming back with their drinks. "It's nothing important. Our drinks are here. Let's toast to Taylor getting in to Berkeley." Marissa gave Alex a questioning look, but decided to let the matter go.

"Great idea," Summer chipped in. "Come on, raise your glasses." Everyone did as they were told. "To Taylor."

"To Taylor," echoed the rest.

"Thanks again you guys," Taylor said. "Now, we just need to wait for your acceptance letters and we'll all be set."

_All but me._ Alex shook the thought from her head. Wallowing wasn't going to do her any good.

The six immersed themselves in various conversations while they waited for their food to arrive, and continued to do so while they ate. The dinner went by smoothly. As the night wore on, it started to feel more like old times. It truly had been a good while since the six of them had done anything together. However, they'd soon find out that it'd be even longer until it'd be just the six of them again. Much longer.


	11. Secrets

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
**

**Thanks for all your reviews. This chapter isn't much. It's just another filler.**

* * *

"Hey blondie."

Alex was wiping down the counter when she heard a familiar voice. She looked up, surprised to see the brunette standing there. "Summer, what are you doing here?"

"Well, it's good to see you too," Summer replied sarcastically as she made herself comfortable on a bar stool.

"You know what I mean."

"So what does a girl have to do to get something to drink around here?" asked the brunette.

"Summer," began the blonde, "you do know that we're closed right?" She couldn't but let a smirk grace her face, knowing that it would annoy the short brunette.

Summer rolled her eyes. "Well, what's the point in being friends with the manager if there aren't any benefits….like free drinks _even_ when it's closed."

"Well…." Alex stated, "I can get you the drink, but I don't know about the free part." Summer simply glared at the girl. "I'm kidding. Jeez. What would you like?"

Summer continued to glare at Alex for a few more seconds before she replaced it with a smile. "Just water please."

Alex handed the girl a water bottle. "I hope the brand is okay with you ma'am," she added teasingly.

"Eh….it'll do," Summer replied, giving her another smile.

"So…" began Alex, "what _are_ you doing here?"

"Coop couldn't make it. Social chair stuff. So she asked me to come down here to tell you and keep you company."

"More like keep an eye on her," came a voice. Both girls turned in the direction of the voice. Jodie was making her way towards the girls from Alex's office. She planted herself next to Alex behind the bar.

"You must be Jodie," Summer said.

"That's me," boasted Jodie. "Number one best friend of this blonde bombshell here." Jodie went to put an arm around Alex's lower back and waist and gave her a little squeeze.

"Jodie!" cried out Alex in pain.

"Oh shit! I'm sorry Al," apologized Jodie as she immediately remove her arm. "I forgot."

"What's wrong?" Summer asked, concerned.

"Oh nothing," answered Alex. "Jodie just decided to run into me yesterday and my back paid the price.

"It was an accident!" Jodie let out. "I said I was sorry. I really am."

Alex saw her friend's face and knew that she was being sincere. "It's okay. I just didn't think it'd hurt this much. I mean I was fine yesterday."

"You know," Summer began, "a massage might help."

Alex looked at her questionably. "Wouldn't that hurt even more? I mean Jodie just gave me a simple squeeze and that hurt like hell. A massage requires someone touching me everywhere and probably more aggressively. How would that help?"

"A massage actually helps reduce pain," Summer stated indignantly. "A Swedish massage would probably do wonders for your back pain."

Alex shrugged her shoulders. "Even if I wanted one, I don't know any masseuses. Nor could I afford one."

"That's where I come in," Summer said. "I've been taking these courses. I could give you one for free." Alex gave her a skeptical look. "Ask Cohen if you don't believe me. I give him one often._ He _enjoys it."

"Well, he _is_ your boyfriend," Jodie hinted.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Summer asked, annoyed.

Alex cut the Latina off before she could answer. "She doesn't mean anything by it. I appreciate the offer Summer, but it'll probably be gone in a few days. I'll just take some aspirin or something until then."

"Suit yourself," the brunette replied. "A massage is still a good thing to get. I personally love them. Oh well. I got to get going or I'll be late for class. I'll see you later Alex." She turned to face Jodie. "It was nice meeting you." The Latina gave her a nod. Summer made her way towards the exit. She stopped halfway and turned around. "By the way, Taylor's sorry about her comment last night. She didn't mean to let it slip. She was just excited, you know?"

"I know," answered Alex. "Tell her no harm done. Hey, do you want anything to eat? I feel bad that you had to give up your lunch. I mean, we don't really have much, but I'm sure I could find you something."

"No, I'm good." Summer hesitated a little before she continued. "You should tell her. Despite what you say, it _is_ a big deal." With that Summer turned around and left.

"She's a character," commented Jodie.

Alex chuckled. "Yeah, she is. However, she is the one person you don't want to test your boredom around."

"Is that so?" Jodie asked intrigued.

"Yeah. Hell, even I'm scared of her."

"Huh. She strikes me as too high maintenance anyway. She's right though." Alex arched her eyebrow. "You should tell her. Marissa."

Alex let out a sigh. "I know."


	12. Pains

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Thanks again for all the reviews. I really do appreciate them!**

* * *

Alex's back pains couldn't have come on a worse day. It was Friday night, and the Bait Shop was once again packed. The fact that she was consistently busy did help the blonde get her mind off her pains, but it never lasted long. Mandy kept insisted that they'd be fine without her. Jodie even offered to help out, but Alex wasn't going to leave on one of their busiest nights. Besides, she'd just go home to an empty apartment anyway. She definitely didn't want that. She'd rather suffer through her back pains.

"A long island please," ordered a customer.

"Two bud lights," ordered another. Alex set to work on their orders. She was setting down the two beers when one of the other bartenders slipped and bumped into Alex. The blonde sucked in a breath and somehow managed not to drop the beers.

"I'm so sorry, Alex" apologized the bartender. "It's just so busy, and orders are coming in so quickly-"

"Don't worry about it," Alex said through clenched teeth. "Can you just tell Mandy that I'm taking a break in my office." Alex didn't even wait for confirmation. She made her way to her office, trying carefully to keep herself coming into contact with anybody else. However, with the club being so packed, she didn't completely escape unscathed. She made it to her office and let out the scream that she was suppressing once she was in. She went over to her desk and took out the bottle of aspirin. She popped two in her mouth, only to realize that she didn't have anything to wash it down with. Great. She forced herself to swallow it down and went to lay down on her couch. She buried her face in the cushion and waited for her medicine to kick in. She took that time to bask in her solitude. However, she was soon interrupted.

"I have a present for you!" came a voice.

Alex groaned and mentally cursed herself for not locking her door. "Go away Jodie."

The Latina rolled her eyes and ignored the girl's remarks. "How's the back?"

"Fucking great!" mumbled Alex.

"Well, being the nice person that I am, I went out and got you a heating pad. I figure it'd work better than ice." Jodie paused for a bit and then smirked. "Plus, I know you like it hot and steamy."

Alex couldn't but smile. She lifted her head up and there in Jodie's hands, was the heating pad. She gave her friend an appreciative smile. "Thanks, Jodie."

"Don't thank me yet. Let's see if it helps first." Jodie went and stood next to the blonde. "Is there an outlet nearby?"

"There should be one right next to the couch."

"Ah, I see it." Jodie went to plug it in. "How hot do you want it?"

"The hotter, the better."

Jodie smirked. "Same old Alex." Alex simply rolled her eyes. The Latina set the pad to it's highest setting. "Ready?" Alex nodded and proceeded to put her head back down. Jodie lifted the back of Alex's shirt high enough to accommodate the heating pad. She placed it on her back and sigh of content was instantly heard. Jodie chuckled. "I take it that it's helping."

"I don't know, but it sure feels good." There was a knock at the door. "Come in."

"Hey, I was just coming in to check on you."

Alex looked to see that it was Mandy that had entered. "I've been better, but the medicine should kick in soon. I'll be out soon."

"Take your time," insisted Mandy. "Everything's under control for now." Alex gave her a skeptical look. "Well, maybe not under control, but we can handle it. I'll come get you if we get really slammed. Well, I'm going to so that doesn't happen."

"Thanks Mandy."

"No problem." She gave Jodie a nod and left.

A silence fell upon the two friends, but it was nowhere near uncomfortable. "You know," stated Alex a few minutes later, "you still haven't told me the reason for your visit."

"Do I need a reason to visit my best friend?"

"Well…no, but I get the feeling that you do have a reason. Three weeks is a good amount of time….your job just let you have it off?"

Jodie just shrugged her shoulders. "I told them that I was taking it regardless, so yeah…."

Another silence ensued. Alex lifted her head and looked at Jodie. "Sorry, I haven't been the best host. I mean you've been here almost a week now, and we haven't really done anything. All you've really done is hang out with me at work. I know that's not the most fun. You don't have to hang around me you know. Explore Newport some. It'll probably be more fun."

Jodie shrugged her shoulders once more. "I don't mind. I'm enjoying my time here. I like hanging out with you here, even if you're working. I came to visit you, not Newport. Besides, it beats coming up with the right variety of music for Marissa's party, which I'm apparently going to DJ."

Alex gave her friend a sheepish smile. "Sorry. I was trying to get Marissa in a better mood for your visit."

"Al," Jodie began, "Marissa's shitty mood is pretty much a permanent thing as long as I'm here." She decided to ignore the defeated look the blonde was giving her. "Anyway, even if you did have free time, she'd monopolize it."

"Jodie…"

"Listen Alex. You're my friend and I love you. I know you don't want to hear this but, I wouldn't be a good friend if I didn't say something." Alex braced herself for what was coming. She knew that Jodie was going to say whatever she wanted to say. Trying to stop would be futile. "Marissa treats you like shit, and you know it. I know you love her, but don't let that excuse her behavior. She only spends time with you when she needs to or after you've begged her to. I mean, you shouldn't have to beg her. She's your girlfriend for fuck's sake! She doesn't even spend that much time with her friends anymore. She doesn't even come home sometimes. She's off doing god knows what. She's forever off with that Volchok guy. I know you've seen the way he looks at her, and how his hand always seem to be touching her somehow. I haven't even been here all that long and I've noticed it! I don't want to think she's cheating on you, but-"

"Then don't. She's spending more time with me now and-"

"That's because I'm here!" exclaimed Jodie. She was starting to get irritated. She didn't want to take it on her friend, but she wasn't going to allow her let Marissa off the hook that easily. "She thinks I'm here to steal you back. She seldom lets us be alone. When she can't be here herself, she sends her friends here to look after things. Don't flatter yourself and think it's because she loves you and the thought of you with someone else scares her. That's bullshit and you know it." Alex turned her head away, not wanting to hear anymore. She could feel her tears building up with each word that comes out of her friend's mouth.

Jodie saw the pained look on Alex's face. She hated knowing that she put it there, but she had to say her piece, and Alex needed to hear it. She got off the couch and crouched down next to the blonde's head. She took her hand, placed it on Alex's cheek, and turned her face so that they were looking at each other once again. She took a breath before she continued. "Alex….she's not spending time with you again because she wants to. It's because she needs to. She doesn't want you, but she still considers you as hers. Even if she doesn't want you, she won't let anyone else have you. She sees you as something to have. Something to keep around cause she likes the hold that she has on it. She _doesn't_ see you as someone to love. She doesn't lo-"

"What the hell is going on here!" Marissa was livid. She was told that Alex was in her office resting. The brunette was actually worried. She knew that Alex's back was bothering her, but apparently it was worse than the blonde had let on. She quickly made her towards Alex's office only to find her girlfriend with her ex….again. With their faces so close and Jodie's hand on Alex's cheek, it looked like they were about to kiss-if they hadn't already. Marissa's worry was instantly filled with anger. "Well?!"

"What does it look like?" answered Jodie. "I'm trying to get it on with your girlfriend. Didn't you know that Alex loves getting it on at the workplace? I'll try to be gentle this time. Apparently pinning her up against the wall last time wasn't such a good idea." She knew she shouldn't have, but she couldn't help herself.

"What!" exclaimed Marissa. She closed the door and turned her head to look at her girlfriend. She was gripping on the door knob like her life depended on it. Well, maybe not _hers_, but Jodie's just might. This newfound information of how Alex had hurt her back wasn't exactly helping either. In the blonde's defense, Alex _had_ told her that Jodie had pushed her into her office door. Marissa instantly didn't like the sound of that. Alex assured her that it was nothing, and it was just an accident. Now Jodie is saying otherwise. Add that to what she just walked in on and well, Marissa was beyond enraged now. Still, she somehow found it in herself to not immediately believe what was coming out of the Latina's mouth. However, her girlfriend had a lot of explaining to do. "Alex," she said expectantly.

"Jodie." Alex's voice was a bit soft, but there was no mistaking her tone.

"Sorry, I couldn't help myself." The Latina got up and went to go sit on the desk.

Alex let out a sigh as she slowly got up into a sitting position. The aspirin hadn't fully kicked in, but the pain was more bearable now. When Jodie saw that Alex was trying to sit up, she rushed to help her friend. She didn't want the blonde to strain herself too much.

Watching her girlfriend struggling to just sit temporarily made Marissa forget her anger. That was, until she saw Jodie coming to her aid. She may have just been trying to help, but given what she saw earlier and Jodie's remarks, Marissa couldn't help but get even angrier at the sight. She rushed towards and grabbed Jodie's hand. "Keep your hands off _my _girlfriend!"

"Watch it," warned Jodie as she pulled her hand out of Marissa's grip, "I have little patience for people who put their hands on me. I have even less for you."

"Well, then maybe you should just stop whoring yourself around! Don't you feel pathetic at all? Spending all your time with a girl that doesn't want you? She chose me! Get that through your thick, skanky head."

Jodie took a step towards Marissa. However, before she could retaliate, Alex got up and stood in between the two. Getting up so abruptly resulting in a sharp pain coursing through her, but she didn't have time to dwell on that now. "Marissa. Jodie. Stop. Please."

Marissa crossed her arms and gave her attention to Alex. "Answer my question. What the hell were you two doing?"

"Nothing," answered Alex. Jodie came in to give me a heating pad for my back. She was just checking up on me, and keeping me company until the medicine kicked in.

"Why the hell was she touching you then? Why did it look like she was going to kiss you?"

"I'm right here, you know," interjected Jodie.

Marissa glared at the Latina. "Jodie," pleaded Alex. Jodie held up her hands in surrender and returned to her previous position on the desk.

Alex gave her a grateful smile before turning to face Marissa again. "I was in a lot of pain. I turned my head to try and hide it. Jodie was just trying to make sure I was really alright." It wasn't a lie really. She was in pain. It just wasn't because of her back.

Marissa simply looked at Alex. She wasn't sure if she should believe Alex. Alex had never lied to her, but still. Her eyes darted back and forth between Alex and Jodie for a bit. Suddenly, she turned around and left.

"Marissa!" Alex called out. The brunette chose not to hear her. She needed to go. She bumped into a variety of people on her way out, earning her some choice words. Marissa didn't care though. Then, she bumped into Ryan.

"Whoa!" Ryan laughed. "Someone's in a hurry."

Marissa had no time for this. She was about to walk off, but a better idea popped into her head. "Sorry, Ry. I just wasn't really looking. So where's Taylor and the rest of the gang?"

"They aren't here yet. I thought I'd get here before them and try to grab a table. It's a busy night. Alex must be swamped."

"Uh-huh. So do you want to dance?"

"Uh…"

"Great. Let's go." Marissa dragged Ryan onto the dance floor. She started to dance with the boy rather closely, seductively even. Ryan wasn't sure what was going on, but he was starting to feel a little uncomfortable.

"Uh…Marissa I don't-"

"Come on Ryan, it's just dancing. Let loose a little." She flashed him her most innocent smile. Ryan still wasn't completely comfortable. He didn't match her moves, but he tried to dance with her as best as he could.

Alex rushed out of office to find Marissa. She finally found her. The brunette was throwing herself onto Ryan. A part of her knew what Marissa was doing. However, that didn't stop the breaking of her heart. It continued to break as she watched her girlfriend press herself into another guy, into her ex.


	13. Selfish

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Thanks for all the reviews!**

* * *

Jodie felt an intense feeling of anger and hatred go through her. It was all she could do to not march up to Marissa and give her a piece of her mind…..and fist. Fortunately for the brunette, the only thing that stopped Jodie from doing so was her concern for her friend. "Al…."

Alex continued to watch her girlfriend throw herself onto Ryan. She felt her heart incessantly breaking. She felt the tears forming, but she wasn't going to let them fall. She was about to turn away when her eyes met with Marissa's. They held each other's gaze for a moment before Marissa turned her attention back to Ryan.

This didn't go unnoticed by the sandy haired boy. He looked at Marissa a bit before he turned to look at Alex. Alex had turned and made her way back towards the bar. However, Ryan was able to catch the blonde's heartbroken face before she turned around. He then realized what Marissa was doing. He just stood there, feeling disgusted. Then, he felt his anger take over. He was mad at himself for hurting Alex. He knew he wasn't really to blame, but still. He was beyond furious with Marissa for using him against Alex. "You're such a bitch."

Marissa stopped dancing upon hearing Ryan's words. She glared at him. "Excuse me?"

"Look, I don't know what's up with you and Alex at the moment, but I'm willing to bet that you're probably at fault. She's my friend too, and I don't appreciate you using me against her. The next time you feel the need to throw yourself on someone, pick someone else. God, I'm surprised she hasn't dumped your ass yet!"

"Whatever Ryan," Marissa said, getting angry, "you're just scared that you're going to be in the doghouse for dancing with me that way."

Ryan was trying to keep his anger in check. He looked at his ex and wondered why and how she'd gotten this way. "That's another thing! You don't ever think of anyone but yourself anymore. You know that I'm with Taylor but that didn't stop you from using me to get to Alex, did it? Did you stop to think how much that might've hurt her? You're supposed to be her friend. How'd you feel if Alex did to you with Jodie? How would you feel if she was that with Jodie _just_ cause she'd knew it would hurt you? Well, there's no point in speculating cause Alex would _never_ do that to you. It's taken me forever to gain Alex's trust and friendship. If all that's gone now because of your little stunt, I will never forgive you. Never." With that said, Ryan left in search for Alex.

Marissa stood there, watching Ryan leave. His little rant only fueled her anger. Having Alex watch her dance with Ryan brought her some gratification, but it wasn't enough. She was still livid. She was still hurt, but the brunette refused to admit that to herself. She stole one quick glance at Alex before she stormed out of the club. She wasn't sure where she was going. All she knew was that she needed to get away from the place.

"Alex, I'm so sorry!"

Alex looked up to find the owner's voice. "Not now Ryan."

He wasn't about to give up though. "I didn't realize what she was doing and-"

"Listen Ryan-I'm not mad at you." She really wasn't. She knew that he was just really an innocent bystander in all this. She saw the doubtful look upon Ryan's face. "Really, I'm not. I know she was using you to get to me. And it worked. Don't worry about it though. You have nothing to apologize for. Look, it's really busy tonight and I'd rather just forget the whole thing for now. Okay?"

Ryan couldn't tell if Alex meant what she said, but she was right. They were packed, and he didn't want to get in her way and risk angering her too. "Okay. We're cool though, right?" Alex simply nodded. "Alright, I'm going to wait for the others. Again, I'm sorry."

The blonde watched the boy's retreating form. She felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around and saw the concern on Jodie's face. "Let me just get through work first, okay?"

Jodie consented and set out to help Alex and the others for the rest of the night. Telling her that she didn't need to would've been futile. There was no way she was going leave Alex.

--

Before Alex realized it, she was back home sitting on her couch. The rest of the night seemed like a blur. Her thoughts were mainly consumed with Marissa. She was hoping the brunette would be home so they could work things out, but as usual, she wasn't.

"How are you?" As the night wore on, Jodie's concern for Alex only. The blonde has barely spoken two words.

Alex turned to look at Jodie. She wasn't in the mood to talk, but she was grateful that Jodie was there for her. "Like shit. Can we talk tomorrow? I really just….I just want this night over with."

"Yea. Of course." The Latina gave the blonde a reassuring smile. "I'm right here if you need me."

"Thanks." Alex made her way into the bedroom. She stripped down to her boy shorts and tank top. She went to go sit on her side of the bed. She took off her jewelry and place them on her nightstand. Her eyes fell on the picture she had on there. She took it in her hands. It was a picture of her and Marissa at the beach. It was back when things were still great between them. Alex focused on Marissa's smile and wondered if she'd ever be the cause of one of the brunette's smiles again. Alex felt herself on the verge of crying again, so she put the picture back. She let out a sigh as she threw herself onto the bed, an action she regretted immediately. "Fuck!"

Instantly, Jodie was in the bedroom. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I just forgot that my back was hurting before I threw myself backwards." It was true. The only good thing about all this was that Alex was able to temporarily forget about her back. However, given the option, she would've easily chosen the back pain instead. "We left the heating pad at the club, didn't we?"

"Yeah, I can go grab it if you want."

"No, it's okay. I'm just going to take something and sleep.""Alright. You know, maybe you should take Summer up on her offer-about the massage."

"Maybe."

"Okay then. Good night."

"Night Jodie."

* * *

**Not much, but I just wanted to post something since it's been a while. I'm working on the next update now. If I don't post it tonight, then it'll definitely be up tomorrow.**


	14. Broken

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**vero: It's nice to see a new face. I hope I can continue to amaze you.**

**malex4ever: I know Marissa's not your fave person at the moment. I'm thinking this chapter won't help that matter either.**

**Just so you guys know, this story is almost over. Once again, thank you for all your feedback and support.**

* * *

It had been a little over a week since Alex had seen or heard from Marissa. A week and two days to be exact. She tried calling the girl numerous times and left plenty of voicemails, but they were never returned. With each passing day, passing hour even, Alex felt herself die a little more, felt her heart break even further. She spent her days working and her nights drinking until she passed out. Jodie was by her side through it all. Alex was more than grateful, but all she wanted was Marissa. She'd ask Summer how the lanky girl was doing. Each time the girl would tell her that Marissa seemed fine. She even said the night before that Marissa seemed happier, lighter. Judging by the guilty and apologetic look upon Summer's face, the blonde knew she wasn't meant to know that bit of information. Alex supposed that she was glad the tall brunette was happy, but she couldn't help but feel even worse knowing so.

Looking around her apartment, Alex's mind was invaded with memories of Marissa. Her only solace was that Marissa hadn't moved out yet. She didn't spend the night there anymore, but there was evidence that the girl came by the apartment. Discarded clothes on the floor, different pairs of shoes missing, different school books laying around….it wasn't much, but it was all Alex had to hold on to at the moment.

"Let's go to the beach."

Alex looked up to see Jodie getting up. "I'm not really in the mood."

"Come on Al," urged the Latina, "It's Sunday, your only day off. Let's enjoy it. You've been working too much lately." Ever since the night of the fight the blonde had been working even more, if possible.

"Jodie, I-"

"Look. If we stay here, you're just going to sulk all day. I'm not saying you have to stop doing that. I'm just saying why don't we change the scenery. I mean, you can still sulk at the beach, and I promise not to get on you for it. Okay? Please?" Jodie hated seeing her friend in such a state. She hoped that the beach would be able to lift the blonde's spirit a bit. Maybe it wouldn't. Maybe all Alex would do was indeed just sulk, but it was better than her sulking at home.

Alex thought about rejecting the offer, but then decided to go along with it. Perhaps it'd help. "Okay."

"Great! Grab your surf board too. You know, just in case."

**--**

The two girls were just sitting on top of their boards in the water. Alex was looking absently to the shore. Jodie was able to get her to do a little surfing, but it did little to take her mind off a certain brunette.

"Maybe I should just go to her school. You know, wait for it to let out and talk to her there."

"Alex…."

"I know, Jodie. I know. I need to talk to her though. I need to see her. If she'd just let me explain-"

"You already did, and she didn't believe you. You can't keep putting yourself through this, Alex. She's not worth it."

"Don't say that!" snapped the blonde. "Just because you don't like her, it doesn't give you the right to trash her."

Jodie sighed inwardly. "I'm not trying to do that. I just….I hate seeing you like this."

The blonde felt herself getting angry. "You think I _like _being this way! You think I like spending my nights drinking myself into oblivion hoping to ease the pain just a little bit? You think I like waking up every morning only to find that I'm still alone-that she's still not there. Or that I like spending every second of my day hoping she'll come around? Hoping the next person I see is her? Hoping my next phone call is from her?" Jodie stay silent, which only seemed to anger Alex even further. "Well do you? Answer me!"

Jodie turned her gaze away from Alex's. "No. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to imply that. I just….I'm sorry."

Having realized that she just snapped at the one person that's been there for her, Alex instantly felt remorseful. Summer, Seth, Taylor, and even Ryan have been trying to reach out to her to. They'd come to the club, and spend some time with her. They tried to console her, but it did no good. It was Jodie, however that was with her during the nights. She was with Alex when passed out. She's the one dragged her to bed. She's the one that's still here. Lately, the others haven't been coming around. Taylor still did somewhat, but Alex could tell that the brunette felt out of place with her. She reached out and took Jodie's hand. "No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have taken my anger out on you. You've been nothing but wonderful and this is how I repay you. It just hurts so much. It's like I can actually feel my heart continuing to break."

Jodie wasn't mad at the girl though. "I just hate not being able to do anything to help you. I can't help but feel this is partially my fault."

"Jodie, this isn't-"

"No let me finish." The Latina kept her eyes downcast. "I mean, I know you guys were having problems before, but it's not like I was helping things. I was the reason your back was hurting. I'm the one who couldn't keep her big mouth shut. I let my want to pick on Marissa get the better of me, and it may have just cost you your relationship. I'm sorry."

Alex hadn't realized her friend felt this way. This only made her feel even worse for lashing out at her. "Jodie look at me. Please." Jodie was hesitant, but she did as she was asked. "You _are _helping me. You being here for me means more to me than I could ever express. This isn't your fault. Like you said, we've been having problems before. You didn't worsen them. Please don't blame yourself. I don't, and you shouldn't either."

Jodie smiled. "Thanks." She was grateful for Alex's words, but she still couldn't help the way she felt. A silence fell over the two girls. Both were just gazing ahead.

"Her birthday's this Saturday," Alex said, breaking the silence. She turned to face Jodie. "You're still going to DJ, right?" Alex noticed the incredulous look upon Jodie's face. "I know it's a lot to ask, but it would really mean a lot to me if you would. You're the best, and she deserves the best. She only turns 18 once. Please."

More than anything, Jodie wanted to say no. She even felt a little insulted. "Alex, she's the reason why my best friend is in so much pain right now. I don't-"

"Please. I _need _this party to be the best.It's my only connection to her at the moment. I feel like if I fail it, I'll fail her. It's the one thing that I can still do for. I can't screw it up. I just_ can't. _If I can make it perfect, then maybe she'll talk to me again. I know I'm probably not making sense, but I just…I just need it to be perfect."

Somehow Jodie was able to make sense of what Alex was saying to her. "Okay, but I'm doing it for you. Not her."

"Thank you. Do you mind if we head in? I just want to go home and lay down for a bit."

"No problem. You could use the rest."

Alex gave Jodie an appreciative smile. She was paddling herself in when something caught her eye, causing her to stop her actions. This concerned Jodie. "Hey Al. Are you okay?" She didn't get an answer though. The blonde was looking ahead at the shore. Jodie followed her gaze and the sight that she saw brought a wave of anger. There, walking along the shore, was Marissa. She was laughing and looking as if her current situation with Alex wasn't bothering her at all. The sight of Marissa being so happy was bad enough. The fact that she wasn't alone made it even worse. By her side, with their arms linked together, was Ryan. He too looked rather happy and was donning a huge smile. Jodie turned to look at Alex. All traces with anger was soon replaced with concern.

Alex looked at the two walking. They looked so care-free. They looked so content. So together. She supposed she should've been angry, but all she felt was even more sadness and a sense of loss. If she wasn't broken before, she sure was now. She felt the last remaining pieces of her crumbling, and she wasn't sure if she'd ever be able to pick the pieces back up.


	15. Popular

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Thanks for all the reviews. I can see that Marissa isn't really favored at the moment, and rightfully so. I kind of wanted it that. No worries-there's no Marissa in this update.**

* * *

Alex's been sitting in her office for the last half hour. She tried not to fill her thoughts with Marissa, but it was near impossible. It's been a few days since Alex saw Marissa with Ryan. She hasn't called the brunette since then. There was a part of her that wanted to call, a part of her that wanted to question Marissa about it. However, she was afraid to do so. She was afraid of what Marissa's reasoning would be. She was afraid that Marissa would tell her that it was over between them. Despite it all, the blonde still wanted her. While their relationship may indeed be over, Alex wasn't ready to face it yet.

There was a knock. "Jodie, just give me a few more minutes please.""

"It's Julie Cooper-Nichol."

Alex immediately got up from her chair and made her way to the door. "Julie. Hi," blonde greeted as she opened the door. "Please come in." Julie made herself comfortable in one of the chairs while Alex went to sit behind her desk. "So what's up? I-I mean, how may I help you?"

Julie dug through her purse a bit and brought out a check. She handed it over to Alex. "I just came her to drop off the rest of the payment for the use of the club this Saturday."

The blonde's eyebrow instantly arched in confusion. "You've already paid it in full though."

"I know, but Caleb insisted in giving a little extra. Something about it being good business or whatever."

Alex looked at the check. "I'd hardly call 5,000 a little extra."

Julie shrugged her shoulders. "Caleb considers it as nothing. If you could just let the owner know it's our way of showing our appreciation." Julie took a good look at Alex. The blonde looked terrible. It looked as if she's lost some weight. Her eyes were a little sunken in, but there was something else about them. Her usually tired eyes looked even more so. Still, there was always a slight defiance in them. They used to show some hope, some life. Given the recent events, Julie supposed that it was normal. However, she didn't expect them looking so empty. It wasn't just her eyes either. It was Alex as a whole. "So….how are you?"

Alex looked at the older women suspiciously. _Does she know? I bet she's just ecstatic that her daughter's no longer dating a girl._ "I've seen better days."

Julie nodded. "Well, Summer and Kaitlyn should be by the next day or two, if not today, to show you their decorations. The decorators will be here bright and early Saturday. I'm sure Summer will too. She can't have her ideas being misrepresented. Seth and Ryan will be here to help set up too. I believe that's it." Julie hesitated a little before she asked her next question. "What are you going to get Marissa?"

"I have something in mind, but I'd rather keep it a secret, if you don't mind." Truth was Alex already had her gift all ready. She'd been planning secretly for weeks now. It took a lot of doing, and it was going to set her back a bit financially for a while. That didn't matter to the blonde though. She knew it'd make Marissa happy, and that's all she cared about it.

"Well, if you must keep it a secret, then so be it. I have to get going. I have an appointment at the spa. See you Saturday!" Before Alex could even say bye, Julie was out of the door. Jodie appeared not too long after. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah, discussing some details about the party." Jodie was about to say something when there was another knock on the door. Alex looked up to see Taylor in the doorway. _I seem to be popular today_. "Taylor, what are you doing here? Don't you have school?"

"I decided to cut. I thought maybe we could hang out?"

This surprised the blonde. "I don't know, Taylor. I still have a lot to do before we open up tonight. I-"

"Just go Alex," interrupted Jodie. Apart from her being too hyper sometimes, Jodie found Taylor to be quite an interesting person. Sure, she annoyed Jodie at times, but it was a good kind of annoyance. All in all, she thought Taylor was a pretty good person. She couldn't exactly say she still felt the same way about Alex's other friends. "I'll take care of it for you."

"Jodie, you've already done too much. I can't ask you to-"

"You're not asking. I'm offering. Actually, I'm demanding it. I _have_ done a lot for you, and the least you can do is repay me by having some fun. I mean, really-is that too much to ask?"

Alex stared at Jodie for a bit. For the millionth time these past weeks, Alex was grateful for Jodie in her life. She got up and gave Jodie a tight hug. "Thank you," she whispered, "for everything."

Taylor watched as the two friends embraced. She too was glad that Jodie's been by Alex's side. However, the sight did make her feel a little guilty. She felt guilty for not being there for Alex as much. It's not that she didn't want to be. She just wasn't sure if her presence was wanted by the blonde. She knew that Alex felt like everyone was on Marissa's side. They were Marissa's friends first. Technically, she was more Alex's friend than Marissa's. Still, given her relationship with Ryan, Taylor wasn't sure where she stood with Alex. She wasn't sure if she guilty by association so to speak. The brunette wished she could let Alex know of the current going on's with Marissa, but she knew she couldn't.

"Taylor you should go join those two, and then put me in the middle, squeeze real tight, and I would love you girls forever!"

All three girls turned to see who had spoken. "Careful Seth," teased Taylor, "don't want Ryan to know that you're perving on his girlfriend, do you?"

"Please," scoffed Seth. "He'd totally commend me for being able to wait this long."

Alex shook her head as she let go of Jodie. "What are you doing here also?"

Seth walked into the room and threw his arm around Alex's shoulders. "Well, it's lunchtime, and I have two free periods following. I decided to spend it with my favorite sexy bartender instead of being bored at school."

"Uh…thanks," replied Alex. _And my popularity increases._ "Are you sure Summer won't mind?" Alex didn't blame Summer for hanging around less. Marissa _is _her best friend.

"Why would she mind?" asked Seth.

Alex shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. With the way things are between Marissa and me-"

"Hey," interrupted Seth. "We're your friends too Al. Right Tay?" Taylor arched her eyebrow at Seth's nickname for her but nodded nonetheless. "I know that we haven't been around lately. It's just…..well, Marissa is….."

"It's okay Seth," commented Alex. "You don't have to explain. She was your friend first."

"It's not that," protested Seth.

"Don't worry about it okay," assured Alex. "It's no big." She looked between Seth and Taylor. "You guys didn't plan this on purpose, did you?"

"No," replied Taylor. "I didn't know-"

"Well, wait a minute," interrupted Seth. "does it make me look better if the answer is yes? Will it score me enough brownie points to see a kiss among the three of you?"

Jodie looked at the ridiculous giddy smile upon Seth's face. "I'll give you 10 seconds to wipe that smile off, before I wipe it off for you."

Seth's smile instantly dropped. "Okay, okay. I was only half-joking. So what's on the agenda ladies?"

"Alex and I are going to hang out," answered Taylor. "Right?" She looked at Alex with pleading eyes.

Alex wanted to say no, but between Jodie's eyes daring her to such a thing and Taylor's pleading ones, she knew she didn't really have a choice in the matter. Alex relented. "Right."

"Great!" exclaimed Seth. It'll just the be the four of us then. Me and three hot ladies…..don't tell Summer I said that."

"Actually," interjected Jodie, "it's just the three of you. I'm staying behind. You guys have fun though."

"Thanks again, Jodie," said Alex.

Jodie gave her a smile. "Leave already, will you? You guys are slower than my grandma."

Seth, with his arm still on Alex's shoulders, led the blonde towards Taylor. He placed his other arm around the brunette's shoulders, and walked with them out the door. "I do believe this is the first time where it's just the three of us. It's going to be so much fun!" Seth didn't even try to hide his excitement.

Alex only rolled her eyes. _What have I gotten myself into?_


	16. Perfect

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Thanks for all your reviews...and patience. :) Life got a little more crazy the last couple of weeks. However, it has settled down now, and it's just the normal amount of craziness now.**

* * *

"I'm going to kill Jodie," muttered Alex. Naturally, Taylor's idea of spending time together meant shopping. It shouldn't have surprised the blonde, but it did. Taylor was all over the store, going from one section to the next. She, on the other hand, was just standing in place with Seth. "No, I'm going to torture her and then kill her. That's right I'll-"

"You know, you shouldn't talk to yourself."

Alex shot the boy a glare, but he wasn't fazed by it. "Seth, how can you take this?"

The curly head boy looked at her like she'd lost her mind. "Um, hello! My girlfriend is Summer Roberts-the queen bee of shopping. Scratch that-she's the freaking king! I mean, I'm talking lord, no god-"

"I get it Seth," interrupted Alex.

"I'm just saying. Besides shouldn't you be used to this by now? I mean between being the girlfriend of Marissa, who happens to be the best friend of Summer-the established god of shopping, and Taylor's friend, this shouldn't phase you at all."

"I know," sighed Alex. "It's just been a while I guess."

"You're darn right it's been a while Alex," exclaimed Taylor as she whizzed by. "Don't worry though. We'll remedy that for you."

"Great," answered Alex sarcastically, but it wasn't heard by the brunette.

"You know," started Seth. "you could kill time and try to enjoy it. Do some shopping!"

"Why? Taylor took it upon herself to do it for me." Now, the blonde had initially rejected the idea of shopping. However, Taylor went on an all-scale rant about how everyone is doing something for Marissa's party except for her. She wanted to help by getting the perfect outfit for Alex. Apparently, the girlfriend of the guest of honor couldn't be seen looking awful. However, finding the right dress was key because Alex couldn't look _better_ than the birthday girl. That was a no-no. Taylor continued her rant until Alex finally gave in. "Taylorrrr," whined the blonde. "We've already been to a hundred stores and tried on a million dresses. Haven't you found the right one yet?"

Taylor made her way back to the standing duo. She looked at the myriad of dresses she had already gathered. "Well…I guess we can go ahead and try these on. Oh, I know! You go try these on while I continue to shop. Just call out when you've got one on so I can come see." The brunette felt so proud of herself for thinking of such a great idea. She handed the dresses to Alex. "Here you go. I'll see you in a bit."

Before the blonde could get a word in, Taylor was back to zooming around the store. "Come on, Seth. Let's get this over with."

The two made their way towards the dressing rooms. "All right," said Alex. "I'll be back out in a bit."

"Hey, if you want me to, I can go into the actual dressing room with you. That way, you don't have to keep coming in and out. I can just give you my opinion in there." His comments were followed by another glare from the blonde as she made her way into the room. "I'm just saying," he muttered.

After trying on what seemed like the whole store, Alex was starting to become frustrated. No dress seemed to satisfy Taylor. One was too long. Another was too short. One was perfect….except the color was all wrong. Another one was great, but the brunette didn't like the designer.

--

"_Well, why did you pick it out then?" asked the tired blonde._

_Taylor shrugged her shoulders. "I was in a zone. You're not always thinking clearly when you're in the zone."_

"_It's true," added Seth. "You should see when Summer's in the zone. It's almost as bad as her rage blackouts. Scary" Seth shivered as a wave of fear washed over him._

_Alex let out a loud sighed and walked back into the dressing room. Taylor couldn't help but feel a little bad. Yes, she was only trying to help the girl and help take her mind off a certain brunette, but she supposed she could've taken things at a slower rate. "I'm sure the next one will be the perfect one," encouraged Taylor, "then all this will be worth it. You'll see."_

--

About a half hour later, Alex was _still_ trying on dresses. Despite the fact that she was started to get frustrated, Taylor's little plan to help the blonde get her mind off things was working. Well, in a sense it was working. She wasn't so much thinking about Marissa as she was about Ryan. Ever since Alex had seen those two on the beach, she'd been struggling with whether or not she should tell Taylor. What if it was nothing? Sure, it didn't look like nothing, but what if it was truly just two friends hanging out? What if she got Taylor worked up for nothing? She didn't want to do that to her friend, but the thought that Ryan may be cheating on her angered the blonde. The fact that he's possibly cheating with _her_ girlfriend definitely didn't help the matter. Was it all a lie? Was Ryan wanting to be her friend all an act? If he wanted to make a fool out of her, that was fine. However, she wasn't going to let him make a fool out of Taylor. Still, the blonde didn't want her revived distaste for the sandy haired boy cause any unnecessary hurt and pain for Taylor. If the blonde was completely honest with herself, there was also a part of her that didn't want to admit that it was true. She didn't want to believe she'd lost Marissa. Alex let out a frustrated sigh. She just didn't know what to do.

Having heard Alex's sigh, Taylor mistook it as her frustration with the whole shopping expedition. The brunette figured that she was causing Alex more distress than helping her. "Hey Alex…we can call it quits with the shopping for now if you want. I know this isn't exactly your idea of fun. We'll do something else. Anything you want. Name it."

"Okay," replied the blonde. "Let's just finish up with the rest here. I mean, we're pretty much done anyway, right? Besides, the more I do now, the less I'll have to do later." Alex adjusted the dress she had on. "I'm coming out with another one on."

Alex stepped out into the viewing area. She awaited Taylor's critique, but the brunette didn't say anything. Seth, who was previously sitting on a chair in the corner, got up and made his way towards the blonde. He also didn't say anything. Alex waited for about a minute before she spoke. "Either it's really hideous or-"

"It's gorgeous," interrupted Taylor.

"Really?" questioned Alex.

"Really," confirmed Seth.

"But it's so simple compared some of the other ones you picked out. Are you sure it's just not another one you just picked while you were in the zone?"

Taylor went to walk around Alex so that she could see it from every angle. She nodded her head in confirmation. "Definitely. It's more simple, yes, but they way it looks on you is…wow. I mean, finding a great dress is only half the battle. The person's gotta look great in it too. This dress is perfect in every aspect. The cut, the color, the way it looks on you, the way you look in it…all perfect. Right Seth?"

"Right. Really, Al, you look amazing. Perfect."

The blonde was a bit skeptical. This didn't go unnoticed by Taylor. "Seriously Alex, it's the perfect one. You'll look hot without outshining the birthday girl. Although, you'll definitely hold your own. Despite its air of simplicity, it's definitely still very stylish and dressy. It's-"

"Perfect," finished the blonde. She looked down at her dress. "Well, I guess I'll just take your word for it. Too bad it's a tad bit too expensive.

Taylor frowned. "You do know that I'm paying for it right?"

Alex's eyes shot up to meet the brunette's. "Taylor-"

"No arguments, Alex. It was a given that I was going to pay for it. You agreeing to this outing was your consent." Taylor saw that Alex was about to object again. "No. I'm not going to let your pride stop me. I said I wanted to help with the party and this is my way of doing that. If you deny me the right to pay for this, then you're telling me that you don't want my help. Then, I'll be the only one that hasn't pitched in. Are you going let your pride isolate me like that? Plus, let this be my way of thanking you. You went out of your way to befriend me. You introduced me to your friends, to Ryan. You helped me snag Ryan. You've become friends with him. I know that wasn't easy for you, but you did it anyway. You did it for me. You helped keep me cheerful while I was waiting for my letter from Berkley. You continue to put up with me. Please let me do this. I mean, I know I should've thanked you a long time ago, but I'm doing it now."

"She's right," added Seth. Your agreement was your consent. Let her do this, Al."

"Taylor," sighed the blonde. "It's not like you haven't bought things for me before, and you don't have to thank me for all that. We're friends. That's what friends do." Alex especially didn't want Taylor thanking her for accepting Ryan in her life when she was currently regretting that decision.

"Alex," begged Taylor. "I've gotten you like a couple of things and that was for various occasions. This is solely to thank you. The fact that I can use it as a contribution to the party is an added bonus. No, I don't have to thank you, but I want to. Because that's what friends do too. Let me be a good friend. Please."

Alex tried to ignore the brunette's pleading eyes, but she found that she couldn't. "Okay."

Alex's acceptance came out as a whisper, but Taylor still heard it. "Yay!" She went and pulled Alex into a hug, which the blonde happily returned. However, it was very short-lived.

"Taylor, you're going to ruin the dress," warned Seth.

Taylor immediately let go of Alex. "Oh my god, you're right! I can't believe I did that! Quick, take it off so we can pay for it already." Alex went to do as she was told, grateful that the dress hunt was over.

They made their towards the counter. "Now, we just have to find the perfect shoes to go with it," Taylor said, as she gave the dress to the cashier. She saw the look of horror on Alex's face and couldn't but laugh a little. "Don't worry. We'll save that for another day." She hesitated a bit before she spoke again. "You do know that I'm paying for that too, right?" Alex gave her a defiant look. "Well, I am. I said I'd find the perfect _outfit_, not dress. That includes shoes." She handed Alex the dress and took her receipt. The trio made their way towards the store's exit. "Isn't that right, Seth?"

"Yep."

The blonde was getting slightly annoyed with Seth choosing Taylor's side. Well, it was more that she was getting annoyed with him going against her. "You know," began Alex, "Seth isn't doing anything for the party."

"I resent that," interjected the curly-haired boy. "I am helping. I gave you my very valuable opinions on all the dresses you tried on. Plus, I'm helping with setting up on Saturday."

"Right, as long as it doesn't require any heavy lifting," teased the blonde.

Seth playfully pushed Alex. "Careful!" warned Taylor. "I'll not allow you to harm that dress. It's too-"

"Perfect," all three said in unison.


	17. What If

**Discaimer: I own nothing.**

**Thanks again for the reviews! I know some of you are wondering about Marissa. All I can say is that you'll have to wait a bit longer to find out. Enjoy!**

* * *

It was early Saturday morning, very early. The sun was only beginning to rise. While most everyone else was still asleep, one blonde was wide awake. Alex had woken about an hour earlier. She tried going back to sleep, but found the attempt was futile. She decided to go to the beach. She figured if she couldn't sleep, she'd tried to get some more surfing in.

Sitting on the beach, with her surfboard laying beside her, Alex took a minute to soak in the sunrise. Eventually, her thoughts started to bombard her again. Today was the day, the day of the party. She thought about calling Marissa to wish her a happy Birthday, but decided to wait a bit. It was still very early. Alex knew that Marissa wouldn't answer, but she didn't want to risk waking up the brunette. The blonde still hadn't spoken or seen Marissa. However, Alex did attempt to call her the other day. A letter had arrived from Berkley and she wanted Marissa to know. Of course, her call went unanswered so Alex just left a message.

Taylor and Seth continued coming around, keeping her company. She appreciated what they were doing, but the blonde told them that they weren't allowed to skip school for her anymore, which they agreed. They either came by after school or during the evening. Summer even made an appearance the night before. Apparently, Taylor decided to spare Alex another trip to the mall to look for her shoes. She took Summer instead. Both brunettes, along with Seth, came by to show her the new pair of shoes. Alex liked them, but it still took a lot of convincing to get Alex to agree to accept them. It took Summer threatening to inflict her rage blackouts on the blonde for her to finally agree.

Unfortunately, Ryan also made an appearance that night. It took everything Alex had to suppress her instinct to harm the sandy haired boy. Jodie, too, had to excuse herself to go into Alex's office every so often to avoid doing anything to Ryan-a luxury Alex wish she had. The boy acted like nothing was wrong. He even dared to show compassion for the blonde. Alex wasn't sure what it did more-irritate or relieve her. Perhaps nothing was happening between him and Marissa. Or perhaps Ryan was making a fool out of Alex….and Taylor. Alex was so confused. She just didn't know what to do. She wanted to be absolutely certain before she brought her concerns to Taylor, but Alex wasn't sure how to do that.

The blonde let out an exhausting sigh as she finished watching the sunrise. She had imagined making Marissa breakfast in bed for her birthday. Instead Alex was at the beach….alone, with no clue as to whether or not she was still in a relationship with the lanky brunette.

Glancing at her surfboard, Alex decided she was no longer in the mood for surfing. She got up and dusted the sand off of her. She then reached for her surfboard. She wanted to stay at the beach longer, but she knew she had to get to the Bait Shop soon. She had to prepare for the arrival of the designers….and Summer. She took one last glance at the ocean before she made her way back towards the apartment.

**--**

Alex arrived at the Bait Shop about half an hour late. To her surprise, she saw the designers and movers already going in and out of the club. _I could've sworn I locked up last night._ She quickly made her way into the club.

When the blonde arrived inside, she took a glance around the club. The place was littered with people, furniture, and other various items. It looked like a mess at the moment, but Alex supposed it was to be expected in the beginning. She had no doubt the place would look amazing later tonight.

"Alex!"

Alex looked down to see Summer making her way up the stairs towards her.

"What are you doing here?" asked the brunette.

"Uh….I work here?" replied Alex.

"Not today."

"Huh? What are you talking about and who let you in here?"

"I don't know," answered Summer, shrugging her shoulders. "One of the other bartenders. I don't remember his name, but he had to step out real quick to run an errand for the party. He left me in charge until he came back." Something caught the brunette's eyes. "Hey! Be careful with that! It was very expensive you know!" Summer rolled her eyes before she returned her attention to Alex. "Anyway, Julie told the owner something about not wanting you to work today. The only time she wants you here is during the party…..partying. You're not allow to work at all. The only thing she wants you to work on is getting yourself ready for the party, not the club."

Alex gave her a questioning look. Summer mistook that as her not understanding. "In other words, she wants you to enjoy the day. Go shopping or something."

"I get that Summer. I just…..why did she do that?"

"I don't know, but who cares. Take advantage of it. Oh, Taylor will be by your place around five so you guys can get ready together."

"Summer, the party's not until eight."

"I know. it's cutting it close, but I think Taylor can pull it off."

Alex continued to look at her in disbelief. "Look that won't be necessary. I-"

"No arguments Alex."

"I'm not. I just….I don't think I'll be coming tonight."

Summer's eyes nearly bulged out. "What?! Are you insane?" Her words filled up the room, causing everyone to stop what they were doing and look at the two girls. Alex, herself, was surprised her eardrums didn't burst from Summer's loud reaction. Summer told everyone to get back to work before she returned her attention to Alex. "Let's take this outside."

"Have you lost your mind?" Summer asked once they were outside. "It's Marissa's 18th birthday, your _girlfriend's_ 18th birthday, and you're not going to show?"

"I just don't think she wants me there. I mean, I don't even know if we're even together anymore."

"Of course you guys are still together! You two had an argument. An argument, not a break up! Couples argue all the time. Look at me and Cohen."

"Summer, we haven't spoken in two weeks! Trust me, it's not because _I_ haven't tried. She doesn't want anything to do with me anymore. She's not going to want me at her party. She doesn't…..she doesn't want me."

Summer saw how hard it was for Alex to say the last part. "Listen, believe me when I say she wants you at her party. As for her lack of communication, all I can say is that there is a reason for it. Please Alex. You have to come."

"Why does she want me there? So she can show off her new boyfriend?"

Summer was confused. "New boyfriend? Alex what are you talking about?"

"Well, I guess he technically isn't new. Just forget I said that. The only reason for her not talking to me is that she no longer wants to be with me."

"Call her then. Ask her for yourself."

Alex gave a little sarcastic laugh. "I already did. I called on my way here to wish her a happy Birthday. She didn't answer."

"She was probably still asleep."

"Maybe, but then why hasn't she answered all my other calls? Or return them for that matter?"

"I'll call her then. She'll answer me." Summer took out her phone, but before she could start dialing, Alex placed her hand on top of hers.

"Don't," said Alex. "That'll only prove my point. I'm sure she would answer _your_ calls. She'll answer anyone's but mines."

Summer put her phone away. "Alex," she pleaded. It's her 18th birthday. You have to be there. What if you're wrong. What if she wants you there and you don't go? Even if she forgives you for not being there for her on such an important day, can you? Can _you_ forgive yourself?"

Alex looked out to the water. "I'm not wrong."

"But what if you are? Do you really want to take that chance?"

Summer's earlier words finally sunk in. Alex turned to look at Summer once more. With her eyebrow arched she asked, "Summer, do you know something I don't know?"

Summer looked at her feet. "All I can say is you have to be there." She looked back up at Alex. "Okay?"

Alex was still very much skeptical, but decided to take Summer's word for it. For now. "Okay."

Summer let out a loud squeal before she pulled Alex into a hug. "That's great!" she said as she let go of Alex. "Remember, Taylor will be at your place at five. don't do anything yourself. Let her do it. Don't even shower. Well, I gotta get back in there." Summer made her way back into the Bait shop. "Remember-five o'clock!" she shouted before she disappeared into the club.


	18. Prisoner

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Just a little filler.**

**Thanks for the reviews!**

* * *

Alex has been sitting in her car for the last half hour. After her conversation with Summer, the blonde went straight home. Although she's reached her destination, she has yet to get out of her car. Summer's words kept replaying in her head. For the millionth time since getting in her car, Alex found herself once again wondering what Summer could possibly know, _if_ she knows anything. The blonde was lost in the many possibilities when she abruptly shook herself out of it. Whether or not Summer knew anything, the fact remained that Marissa hasn't once made an effort to talk to Alex. In Alex's mind, that only meant that the brunette didn't want anything to do with her anymore. Alex _still_ didn't know where Marissa was spending her nights. The blonde let out a heavy sigh as she made her way into the apartment.

Not sure whether or not Jodie was still asleep, Alex crept into the apartment quietly as possible. However, looking at the empty couch, Alex realized that there was no reason to. "Jodie?"

"In the bathroom," replied Jodie. "I'll be out in a sec." Alex made herself comfortable on the couch while she waited for her friend. At the sound of the brunette's footsteps, Alex looked up to see Jodie making her way towards the couch as well. "Hey. I didn't expect to see you all day."

"Yea. Apparently, I'm not allowed at the Bait Shop. That is, not until the party and only as a fellow partygoer." Jodie gave the blonde a confusing look. "Julie told Nat that I wasn't to work today. She wanted me to have a day off. She wanted me to have fun." Seeing the confusing look still on her friend's face, Alex just shrugged her shoulders. "I know. I'm confused too."

"Huh," replied Jodie. "That's just…huh."

"Yeah……I told Summer that I wasn't going to go to the party."

"What?!"

"I just didn't feel wanted, you know? With the way things are-"

"How long have you been thinking this?"

"A few days, give or take."

"So you make me promise to be the damn DJ, but you weren't even going to go?"

Alex couldn't help but wince at her friend's words. "It's not like I planned it on purpose. I'm sorry."

Jodie softened her tone. "Al, I'm not mad. Well, I'm not mad that you don't want to go, but the fact that you were going to make me suffer that party all by myself-that's not very nice. Hell, I say we both don't go. We can have our own little party."

Alex smiled at her friend. "Hate to burst your bubble, but Summer was able to convince me to go." Alex decided to keep her concerns about Summer and what she may know to herself for the time being.

Jodie playfully slammed her fist on the coffee table. "Damn her!"

The blonde laughed her friend's antics. "Actually, Taylor will be here at five so that we can all get ready together."

"The party isn't until eight."

A smirk graced the blonde's face. "I know. That's not nearly enough time to get you ready."

Jodie feigned hurt and gave Alex a little shove. Truthfully though, the Latina was more than happy to hear Alex making jokes again.

--

Promptly at five, Alex heard a knock on her door. The blonde had spent most of the day hanging with Jodie and finalizing some last minute details for Marissa's gift. Now the two were just watching a movie. For a second, Alex thought about pretending not to be home, but then thought better of it. She could run, but she couldn't hide. Not from Taylor. Definitely not from Summer. She sucked in a breath. "It's open, Taylor."

The door opened, and there stood Taylor. She was carrying two garment bags, her makeup bag, her purse, a medium sized duffel bag, and two shoe boxes. How she was able to free her hand to not only knock, but open the door as well, was beyond Alex. "Don't just sit there Alex," said Taylor as she made her way past the blonde. "We've got lots to do in three short hours." The brunette disappeared into Alex's bedroom.

"Oh this is going to be fun," smirked Jodie.

Alex gave her a look. "Don't you have to set up or something? Do a sound check? Something?"

"Don't worry," answered Jodie smiling. "I've got some time to spare."

Alex was about to comment when she heard water running in the bathroom, followed by Taylor emerging. "Come on Alex! First thing first, you need to bathe. I'm talking a real bath here, not a shower. We need your whole to be cleansed and relaxed. That way, your entire body will have a glowing effect. I've already started your bath. I put in some bath salts and used a lavender and chamomile bubble soap. It should be ready in a bit."

Alex just sat there. It's not that she didn't want to comply. She just wanted to wait a bit longer so that the tub would have more time to fill up. Taylor, however, took that as an act of defiance. Her eyes narrowed. She put her hands on her hip and got ready to shoot a slew of some interesting words at the blonde.

Luckily, Jodie came to Alex's aid. She saw the look in Taylor's eyes. She saw it the minute Taylor opened the door. The girl was on a mission, a mission she took seriously. It was a mission that had to be completed. Failure was not an option. There was no room for noncompliance. She gave the blonde a slap on the back of her head. "Don't just sit there. Hurry and go! Didn't you hear Taylor? Lots to do and little time. Now get your ass up!" Before Alex could get a word in, Jodie had pulled her up and was now dragging her towards the bathroom. She all but pushed the blonde inside and closed the door. Jodie made her way back into the living room. She made herself comfortable on the couch, and prepared herself for the show. Not the one of TV. The one starring a very goal-oriented and ambitious brunette and her blonde prisoner. Jodie felt a smile gracing her lips. "This is going to be fun."

"Don't forget to shave!" shouted Taylor.

"Very fun indeed," whispered Jodie.


	19. A Taylor Project

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**Thanks for all the reviews. The party will be the next update. I promise.**

* * *

After taking what must have been the most stressful bath in her life, Alex was all but dragged into her room by formidable force. A formidable force by the name of Taylor. Taylor had sat the blonde down on the bed, and Alex hasn't moved from the spot since. That was about an hour ago.

"Taylor," whined Alex. "I need to move. If I sit still any longer I am going to explode."

Taylor scoffed. "Don't be so dramatic Alex. Just hang tight a little longer. I'm almost done."

"I still don't see why I had to get my nails done. I'm going to a birthday party. It's not like it's prom or anything." Taylor had immediately started with a manicure once Alex was out of the bath. She then followed it up with a pedicure.

"But Alex, this is like going to be the best party ever!" Jodie said in her best valley girl voice. "We have to look good." Alex shot her a glare. It was bad enough she had to endure Taylor and her makeover session. The addition of Jodie definitely wasn't helping the situation. It was like the Latina adopted Taylor's personality. She became a mini-Taylor, all to annoy the blonde.

"Stop fidgeting," commanded Taylor. "I have one toe left, and if you make mess up I'm going to start all over. ALL over." This caused Alex to stay completely still. She couldn't endure another hour just sitting on her ass. "There. All done!"

"Finally," sighed Alex. She was about to get up when Taylor's shriek stopped her.

"NO MOVING!"

"I thought you said you were done?"

Taylor huffed. "I am, but you gotta let the paint dry first. Jesus Alex. Work with me here!" The brunette started massaging her temple as she headed out the room. She was muttering something, but Alex couldn't tell what was being said.

"Like, oh my good, Alex!" came Jodie's annoying valley girl voice. "You could've like totally destroyed all of Taylor's hard work! Selfish much?. The glare of annoyance on the blonde's face was probably meant to scare her, but it only caused the Latina to smirk.

"Just be lucky that I'm not allowed to move at the moment," warned Alex. "Don't you have to get going soon?"

"You know, you keep asking me that. I'm starting to think you don't want me here."

"I can't imagine how you'd get that idea."

Jodie pretended to cry. "I'm just trying to be a good friend here. Why can't you appreciate that? What have-ow!"

"Oh shut up! That did not hurt."

Jodie took a defiant stance. "How would you know? _I _was the one that got hit."

"Oh please," scoffed Alex. "It was a pillow!"

"And?" Alex just rolled her eyes as she laid down on the bed, waiting for Taylor to come back. "Unfortunately, you are right. I _do _have to get going." Jodie made her way towards Alex. "I'll see you later," Jodie said as she gave both of the blonde's cheeks a quick squeeze. She immediately stepped back afterwards. Alex was about to get up when Jodie's words stopped her. "Nuh-uh. Your toes are still drying. You don't want Taylor to kill you, do you?" Alex continued to lay there, trying to hold herself back. Jodie couldn't help but laugh. "I'll see you soon blondie!" And with that, Jodie turned to leave.

Five minutes or so had passed and Alex was still laying on the bed, still waiting on Taylor. "Taylor! What are you doing and what's taking you so long?"

"I'm in the bathroom. Just give me a minute."

Alex did. In fact, she gave her about five more minutes. Fed up and figuring that her toes should be dry by now, Alex threw herself off the bed and went to get Taylor. She didn't even bother to knock on the door. She yanked it open right before Taylor was about to open it on her side. "Ahhhhh!"

Taylor looked at her strangely. "Why are you screaming now?"

"You just scared me for a second there," Alex said, after she collected herself.

"_I_ scared you? You're the one that barged in here."

"I know, it's just…." Alex brought her hands to her head and made some kind of weird gesture.

Taylor arched her eyebrow. "Are you feeling okay?"

Alex dropped her hands as a look that was a mixture of defeat and annoyance graced her face. "Your hair, Taylor."

"Huh?" Taylor went to touch her hair. "Ohhhh."

"Yeah." On top of Taylor's head was a mass of curling rolls.

"I got to work on me too." Taylor looked down to Alex toes. "Those had better be dry."

Alex crossed her arms and stuck out her chin in defiance. "They are."

Taylor looked at her suspiciously. "Hmph. Well, get in here. We got to do your hair too."

"It's not going to look like that is it?" Alex asked, pointing to Taylor's hair as she walked into the bathroom.

Taylor gave her a playful nudge. "I've decided to keep your hair fairly simple."

"Oh thank god!"

Taylor cut her eyes at Alex. The blonde just gave a sheepish smile in return. "Anyway, you've got great hair. So I'm just going to straighten it and part it mostly to one side."

"Taylor, I wear my hair like that every so often."

"I know, and you always look great. Why mess with a good thing?" Alex opened her mouth to say something, but then thought better of it. She knew better than to try and get Taylor's logic. Plus, if it meant it wasn't going to take long, then she was all for it.

About another half hour later, Taylor was finally done. Alex was beyond ready to get out of that bathroom. She was starting to get claustrophobic. They really weren't in there all that long, but her bathroom wasn't the most spacious place. Leave it to Taylor to take a decade doing something that was supposed to be quick. Alex could've finished in half the time it took Taylor to do it. The blonde shook her head as she made her way back into the bathroom.

"Why are you shaking your head?"

Alex looked at the brunette before shaking her head again. "Too many reasons."

"O-kay. We're almost done. We just have to do your makeup." Taylor looked at her watch. "We have a little less than half an hour before the party starts. That should be plenty of time."

"I am capable of doing my own makeup you know. I'm not completely incompetent."

"I never said you were, but you can't do your own makeup."

"Why not?"

"Cause I've done everything else. I can't call this a Taylor project if I don't do it all. Of course, I didn't take your bath for you cause…that's just not possible. I mean, you're the one that needed the bath and if I took it then, I would be taking the bath and not you. I didn't need the bath. I showered literally before I came here. I mean, my hair was still dripping some when I arrived. However, I did draw it for you and put all the bubbles in. I didn't do the shaving either. Oh god! I should've shaved you. What was I thinking?! What-"

"Taylor!" The brunette looked at Alex with a worried expression on her face. "Breathe. You can do my makeup. Just no more rambling."

Taylor was instantly smiling. "Yay! We're going to keep it simple. You have a natural beauty so we're just going to compliment it a bit. Just a light foundation. Eyeliner. Mascara. A little lipstick. That should do the trick. We might not even need the foundation. Your skin is so-"

"Taylor."

"Right. Let's get to work."

This time around, Taylor was true to her word. It didn't take long at all. She got up to go to the bathroom to look at herself. Taylor was close behind. "Wow. You did a fantastic job Taylor!"

Taylor beamed at the compliment. "Thanks, but like I said, you're naturally beautiful. I can't take too much credit for it."

Alex turned around to face Taylor. "That's where you're wrong. You deserve ALL the credit."

Taylor's smile grew. "Thanks. And look-all with a little less than 15 minutes to spare. You just have to put on the dress and you'll be all set."

"Great. I was hoping I'd have a little more time to pick up Marissa's gift, but I guess I can be fashionably late."

"Sorry that's not going to work with me."

Alex's face fell. "What are you talking about?"

"I can't have you risking harm to my masterpiece. With if the wind blows really hard and mess up your hair? What if a bird poops on it? What if someone spills something on you? Nope, can't have that."

"Taylor, I _need_ to get Marissa's present."

"I'll pick it up for you." Alex was hesitant. she really wanted it to be a surprise. She didn't want anyone knowing. The only person that knew besides her was Jodie. "Look, you might as well agree cause you don't really have a choice. I'll tie you down if I have to."

"Fine," relented Alex. She knew could trust Taylor. "What about you? Your hair is still like _that_, and you haven't done your makeup yet."

"Don't worry about me," assured Taylor. I've got it all covered. Like you said, I'll just have to be fashionably late." The brunette gave the blonde a smile. "Okay, enough diddle dallying. Tell me where it is already so I can get it. While I do that, you are to put on your shoes and dress. Seth will be here to give you a ride soon."

"I can't even drive myself?" Alex asked, a bit put off.

"Nope. Your objective is to make it to the party looking as you do now, with your dress and shoes on of course. I can't have the risky act of driving endanger that."

It was moments like these that Alex really wondered if Taylor was completely sound. Her logic sometimes was just…illogical. "Fine. I just hope all your efforts won't be in vain."


	20. Tired of Losing

**Here it is finally! Sorry for the wait, and thanks again for the reviews! Hope you're still interested. I tried to post links to how I envisioned the Alex's and Marissa's dresses, but it wouldn't work. Sorry.**

**Dislcaimer: I own nothing.**

The Bait Shop looked gorgeous. Pink seemed to be the theme. The walls were covered with light pink curtains. The booths had tablecloths on them that were a different shade of pink. All the tables upstairs were temporarily replaced with couches that were, of course, pink. There were little hints of streamers throughout the club, and the only places that had balloons were Jodie's station and the table for the gifts. Apparently, Summer didn't want the place looking too childish.

The only place that was left alone was the bar, which was where Alex immediately went to when she first arrived. About half an hour later, her location still hasn't changed. Everybody else was either socializing or dancing. Alex couldn't help but feel a little out of place. The only people she really knew there were Seth and her co-worker. There were a few familiar faces, but that didn't really help the blonde. Of course, Julie and Caleb, along with the Cohens were there too, but Alex wanted to avoid them as much as possible. Taylor still hadn't arrived. If things went according to plan, she wouldn't arrive for a bit. She was supposed to be coming with Ryan, so he hasn't arrived either. Marissa and Summer were still missing also. According to Seth, they take to being fashionably late very seriously.

"Are you sure you don't want to dance?" Seth asked for what seemed like the millionth time.

"No," replied Alex, again, "but thanks." Alex gave him an appreciative smile. Normally, Seth's incessant nature would irk the blonde, but she knew he was just trying to distract her from her nerves. "Also, thanks for being here. I know I'm not the best company at the moment." Since they arrived, Seth hasn't left her side. Alex told him that he didn't need to stick by her, that she'd be fine. However, he saw right through her lie and insisted on hanging around. Naturally, he chalked it up to being able to be seen with a hot blonde.

Seth shrugged off her gratitude. "If you change your mind, let me know. By the way, have I told you how unbelievably hot you look tonight? I mean, wow! I'm seriously wandering why I chose Summer over you right now."

Alex playfully rolled her eyes. "Whatever. You'll always choose Summer, as you should. She's a great girl."

"Yeah," Seth said dreamily. "She is. She really is." A big smile was now found on Seth's face. Seeing it made Alex smile too. Seth was in his stupor for another minute before he spoke again. "You still look hot though."

"Thanks," replied the blonde shyly. Alex was dressed in a tube dress. It stopped about mid-thigh. The color was a slivery blue. It really was simple, but there was something about it that negated the simplicity. Alex theorized that it was the color, but what did she know? She had to admit, the dress did compliment her well. Adding to the outfit was a pair of silver heels and her heart necklace. "I just hope Marissa likes it."

"She'd be a fool not to."

"Yeah." Alex was grateful for Seth's assurance, but it didn't completely quell her insecurities.

A few minutes later, Alex found that the act of sitting still was starting to get to her. "That offer for a dance still stands?"

Seth smiled widely. Since their arrival, he's been trying to get the blonde to loosen up a little. He knew a lot was riding on this night. Not only was the fate of Alex's relationship riding on it, but also the well-being of two of his friends. It was just the simple acceptance of a dance, but it was still a step forward for Alex. "Of course." He stood up and held his hand out for the blonde, which she happily took.

They made their way towards the dance floor. Some upbeat song was playing. The tune sounded familiar to the blonde, but she couldn't place it. She started off a bit stiff. However, Seth being the great guy that he is, started to dance in the most ridiculous way. Alex knew he was doing that to get her to loosen up a little, and it worked. Hell, she even joined him in his silly ways. They were getting odd stares but they didn't care. Soon, Alex was smiling and laughing, something the both of them enjoyed hearing.

They continued dancing that way into the next song, which was also upbeat. Alex was bent over laughing at a move that Seth had done when she heard a familiar voice.

"Mind if I cut in?"

Alex straighten up and turned around. She was about to answer, but Seth beat her to it.

"Uhhh, yeah. Can't you see we're grooving Jodie?"

The Latina rolled her eyes. "Come on. It won't be long since I have to return before the song ends."

Seth stood his ground. "Nope. However, you can join us."

"Seriously Seth," started Jodie, "does everything regarding two girls turn you on?"

"It probably does," answered Alex. "Indulge him. For me. Please."

Jodie let out an impatient sigh. "Fine, but we are not dancing like the two of you were."

"Then I'm sorry but we have no further business with you," Seth said as he continued to dance.

Seeing that Jodie looked like she wanted to punch Seth, Alex decided to intervene on his behalf. "Come on, Jodie. It's fun. Plus, it was helping to take my mind off things."

Jodie relented. "Fine. You owe me though."

Alex gave her a grateful smile. "Are you sure you can just leave your work area?"

"Yeah, it's cool," replied Jodie. "Plus, I left a guy there to oversee thing just in case I didn't get back in time. Apparently, he wants to be the world's best DJ. He was impressed with my skills so he thought he'd learn from the best. He's a little annoying, but his passion is true."

"Whatever," scoffed Alex. "You just like the fact that he's in awe of your skills."

"Damn straight. Now let's get dancing already." With that, Jodie sucked up her pride and started to dance in the most retarded way that she could.

The trio were dancing for maybe a minute when Jodie stopped. Alex noticed this. Seth was too lost in his "dancing" to really notice. "Leaving already? We've barley begun."

Jodie shook her head. "Have you been able to keep your mind off things long?"

Alex was confused. "Only since I've been dancing. Why?"

"Cause I think your reprieve is about to be over." Jodie gestured with her head. Alex followed the direction and saw what Jodie was talking about. Coming down the stairs were Marissa and Summer. "I'm going to head back. I'm here if you need me."

Alex absently nodded. She continued to watch Marissa and Summer make their way down the stairs. Their time apart seemed to sink in as she watched Marissa. Alex wondered how she ever survived the last two weeks without seeing her. She knew she was staring, but she didn't care. It was like everything that they've gone through the past few weeks, the past year, didn't matter. For Alex, it seemed like she had once again found her reason for breathing. When they reached the bottom, Marissa started to scan the crowd. It was then that Alex had a sudden urge to look away, to not get caught staring. However, she found that she couldn't. She spent the last two weeks without seeing Marissa's beautiful face. Now that she had it in full view, Alex couldn't loose it.

Finally, Marissa found the pair of eyes she was looking for. She had been waiting for this moment, and now that it was here, the brunette found that she couldn't move. The two just stood where they were, staring at one another.

Their little staring contest wasn't unnoticed by Summer. She wanted to give the two a moment. She really did, but patience was never her strong suit. She gave them a couple more seconds before she all but dragged Marissa towards Alex. When she reached her destination, she finally noticed Seth. She wish she hadn't. "Cohen! How many times have I told you not to dance like that in public! Especially in my presence!"

Seth froze at the sound of his girlfriend's voice. He turned around to see Summer standing there with one hand on her hip looking anything but happy. "Hey Summer. When did you get here?" He gave Alex a nudge, which brought her out of her stupor. "Why didn't you tell me she was here?" he whispered.

"Oh no. Don't you go blaming this on Alex. You know better." Summer continued to reprimand Seth as she dragged him elsewhere, leaving the two girls alone.

"So…" began Alex. "How have you been?"

"Good," answered Marissa, as her hands were nervously fidgeting with her purse. "What about you?"

"I've been better." Alex saw a look of guilt wash over Marissa's face and immediately felt guilty about her choice of words. She saw that Marissa was about to say something, but she beat her to it. "You look great, by the way."

And she did. Marissa was wearing a halter dress. One of the first thing Alex noticed about the dress was its length, or lack of it. The dress was short, stopping at high on her thigh. It showed off her legs perfectly. She didn't dare let her eyes linger on them. As she moved her eye upward, she took in its slight gold color. She also noticed the plunging neckline. She quickly shot her eyes even further upward when she noticed that. She knew it was better to not tempt herself. However, as gaze stopped at Marissa's neck. Looking at it, Alex felt her heart breaking all over again. "You're not wearing your necklace." Despite everything, Marissa almost always wore her heart shaped necklace. She'd only take it off on occasion, when the occasion called for it-which was fine with Alex. However, Marissa always put it back on the first moment she got. Seeing the brunette now, without the necklace, Alex started to feel her hopes slipping away.

Upon hearing Alex's words, Marissa immediately reached for her neck. She let out a sigh. "Alex, I can explain."

"No, i-it's okay." Alex let out an empty laugh as she looked anywhere but at Marissa. "I-I mean I guess it was silly of me to expect you to still wear it."

"Alex-"

"Really, it's fine. It probably clashed with your dress, and we can't have that. Not on your big night."

Marissa felt terrible. She wanted to tell Alex that the only reason she wasn't wearing her necklace was because the latch broke a couple of days ago, but the blonde wasn't letting her. She took dropped it off at the jeweler's the first chance she got. They had promised that they'd have it fixed in time, but it turned out that they had either overlooked or misplaced her necklace. Marissa wasn't sure. She had pretty much tuned them out when she realized she wasn't going to get her necklace back in time. "Alex, listen-"

"Marissa please," begged Alex. She didn't want to her Marissa's excuses. She'd probably have a good one too, but Alex couldn't bear to hear the girl saying whatever it took to convince her, not about this.

Marissa wanted to protest, but she knew that Alex wouldn't let her to do so at the moment. So she decided to let it go. For now. She made a mental note to correct Alex later in the night.

The two girls just stood there as another awkward silence surrounded them. There were so many things that they both wanted to say, but neither could find the will to do so. No longer able to take the silence and the fact that Alex still wasn't looking at her, Marissa decided to break it. "Do you want to dance? I-I mean, we're already on the dance floor so..."

"Sure." However, Alex didn't move. Her eyes were still elsewhere. She really didn't feel like dancing and was wondering why she had just agreed to do so.

Marissa took a step towards Alex. She used her hands to guide Alex's and wrapped them around her waist. Then, she put her arms around Alex's neck and started swaying. Alex couldn't deny that she was a bit confused. The song that was playing was fast paced one, not a slow one. However, she didn't really mind. The blonde also couldn't deny that it felt good to hold Marissa again. She missed having the brunette in arms. She'd almost forgotten what it felt like. Not knowing if she'd ever get the chance to hold her again, Alex pulled Marissa even closer. She didn't want anything separating them, not even air.

Marissa more than welcomed the lack of space. She, too, had missed the blonde. She had planned so many things to say, but for right now, it could wait. She wanted to revel in the feel of Alex a little while longer. She rested her head on the blonde's shoulder and continued to let their feet do all the talking.

Minutes passed and the pair was still dancing to their own beat. Even though she didn't want to ruin the moment, Marissa knew she couldn't put off what she had to say any longer. Trouble was, she wasn't sure how she should start. So she decided to go with what she was feeling. "I've missed you." She pulled back just enough so that she could look into Alex's eyes. "So much. I...I know that probably doesn't mean much to you right now, but there are some things that I want to say. I know that I don't have the right to ask you of anything, but I'd like it if you'd hear me out. It would really mean a lot to me. When I'm done, should you decide that it's not enough. That you no longer want me, then...I...I'll respect that."

Alex simply looked at Marissa. She wanted to hear what the brunette had to say, but she was also afraid of what it may be. Still, she had to know. "Okay."

Marissa felt a sense of relief wash over here. For a minute there she thought Alex would've told her no. "I'm sorry that I overreacted with the whole Jodie thing. I guess I was jealous. I mean, I was. I don't know. Knowing that Jodie would always have a place in your heart is one thing, but knowing she'd always be in your life-that was something else. I felt threatened by her. I mean, you loved her so much. You had forsaken your family for her, a roof over your head, financial stability...you were willing to give all that up for her. And you did. You gave up so much, but it was worth it for you. You didn't even look at it as giving up anything. You looked at it as gaining someone you loved and trust. I couldn't help but be a little envious of that. I couldn't help but wonder if you'd do the same for me. I mean, why would you when apparently I couldn't do the same for you. Yes, I was living with you, but I was still spending my parents' money. I still didn't have bills to pay. I didn't have to worry about the rent. That was all you. At least with Jodie, everything was equal. It wasn't that with us. We weren't equal. We still aren't." Marissa rested for a moment. She wanted Alex to have a chance to say something. She _needed_ Alex to say something.

A silence fell upon the two again. Alex started to feel an ache inside her chest. She let Marissa's words sink in. They weren't equals. "I know that I'm not up to par, that dating someone like me is beneath you-"

"Alex, I didn't mean it that way." Marissa felt horrible. She didn't mean to imply that she was better than Alex, that she was too good for Alex. If anything, it was the other way around. _She_ was the one that didn't measure up.

"It's okay Marissa. I know I'm not rich, and I'll probably never be. I-"

"Stop! From a monetary perspective, maybe I am better than you. At the very least, better off. However, from any other perspective, the ones that count, you're the one who's superior. I'm the one that's not up to par. I'm the one that doesn't deserve you."

"No. You deserve more. Better."

Marissa felt defeated. Nothing she said was coming out right. The sad look upon Alex's face was crippling. Once again, the girls found themselves in another moment of silence. They two continued dancing when Marissa felt a tap on her shoulder and simultaneously heard,

"May I cut in?"

"No." Marissa didn't even bother to see who it was. She didn't care. All she cared about was the girl in her arms. She wasn't letting her go until things were resolved.

"Marissa," began Alex, "maybe you should let him cut in." Marissa was hurt. Alex would rather dance with someone else. Alex didn't want her.

"I'd really appreciate it if I could," the man said.

Marissa felt herself getting annoyed. She turned around to give the guy a piece of her mind. "Listen, you son of a-Daddy?" Marissa knew she was seeing things. There, in front of her, stood her father. The last time she saw him was a couple of years ago.

"That's me kiddo. Now, what were you going to call me?" teased Jimmy.

Marissa was still in shock, but the minute she heard her dad speak, she regained her voice. "Daddy!" She hugged Jimmy with such force that he nearly fell backwards. Alex just stood there letting the two have their moment.

"Whoa there," he laughed.

"What are you doing here?" Marissa asked, still holding onto her father.

"It's my girl's 18th birthday. Where else would I be?"

"But how did you know? How did you get here?"

"Well, we have Ryan here to thank for that. He picked me up from the airport." Jimmy stepped aside to reveal that Ryan and Taylor had been standing behind him the whole time.

"Ryan?" questioned Marissa. Her confusion was short-lived as she threw herself at Ryan, giving him a giant hug as well. "Thank you so much! I can't believe this! This is the best gift ever!"

Alex shouldn't have cared, but hearing Marissa say thanks to Ryan and seeing her in his arms was too much for the blonde. She quietly slipped away and made her way towards the bar. She sat down and ordered herself a drink. She hadn't been by herself too long when she heard a voice.

"Hey."

Alex looked up to see who it was. "Hey Taylor. How are you?"

"Good, good. Are you okay?"

"Why wouldn't I be. You look great, by the way."

"Thanks. So do you. Then again, why wouldn't we look great? I worked on the both of us."

Alex couldn't help but laugh a little. "That is true." Alex looked over to see Ryan, Marissa, and her dad still in conversation. Marissa was wearing a smile that was a mile long. Alex loved the sight of that. However, she couldn't help but be envious. The reason for her smile was mainly her dad, but Ryan played a part too. Ryan. She'd always be second place to him. "Why aren't you with Ryan?"

Taylor shrugged her shoulders. "They have some catching up to do. Mr. Cooper is great and all, but I don't know him. So...are you going to correct her?"

Alex didn't have to ask what Taylor was referring to. "No."

"Why not?"

"What's the point?"

"I can think of some."

"She's happier this way. The truth might not garner the same degree of happiness."

"Alex..."

"She's happier this way," repeated Alex.

"So...I didn't bring your present."

Alex gave Taylor a questioning look. "Why not?"

"Well, it'd be kind of obvious what it is. There'd be no element of surprise. Where's the fun in that? I left at your place. You can show her when you go home."

"That's assuming she'd come with me."

"She will," assured Taylor. Alex sent her a grateful smile.

"Alex why aren't you dancing with Coop?"

Alex turned around to face a glaring Summer. "Uh...she's kind of busy." Alex pointed with her head.

"Oh my gosh," exclaimed Summer. "Mr. Cooper's here? How?"

"Ryan," answered Alex.

"Well, wasn't that sweet of him," stated Seth. "I guess that whole 'I'll just get her a new purse' was just a cover-up. Sneaky bastard."

"Well, we all know you can't keep a secret sweetie," said Summer.

"Hey!" exclaimed Seth. Summer just shrug her shoulders.

--

"I still can't believe you're here Dad," said Marissa.

"Well, believe it kiddo. I'm here for the whole week. Hopefully, it'll sink in before then."

"This is going to be the best week ever!"

"You got that right," Jimmy said. "So Ryan, Taylor seemed nice."

A smile crept over Ryan's face at the mention of his girl. "Yeah, she really is. She just found out that she got into Berkley. I applied too. Hopefully, I'll get in too."

"I'm sure you will," assured Jimmy. "So Marissa-where's this famous Alex?"

"Oh, she's right-" It was then that Marissa finally realized that Alex had gone. "...here. She was here a minute ago. Let's go look for her. I really want you to finally meet her."

--

Alex, Taylor, Seth, and Summer were laughing at something Sandy had said. Sandy and Kirsten had joined the four not too long after Seth and Summer joined in. Kirsten wasn't laughing because Sandy had been reliving one of her embarrassing moments. She was hiding her face in her husband's chest, willing him to stop.

"Okay, okay," said Sandy. "I got to stop now. I don't want to be in the dog house tonight."

"Who says you aren't already?" Kirsten retorted as she walked away.

A collective "oooh" was heard from the four kids.

"Honey," pouted Sandy as he followed his wife.

"Seth, your parents are hilarious," complimented Alex. "That is, when they aren't blaming me for corrupting their son."

"What can I say," said Seth. "They don't take too kindly to the corruption of their favorite son." All three girls just rolled their eyes.

"Okay seriously," Taylor huffed. "No one, and I mean no one, has complimented my masterpiece yet." Taylor gestured her hands to show that she was referring to Alex.

"I already did when I picked her up," offered Seth.

Taylor looked at Summer and waited for her to say something. Summer also thought that Alex looked amazing. She just wanted to give Taylor a hard time. She took her time giving her opinion. Then, she saw that Taylor was starting to glare at her. "Alright, alright. You look good, Al."

"Good!" shrieked Taylor. "She looks freaking amazing!" Taylor looked up to see Ryan, along with Marissa and here dad, coming over. "Ryan! Tell them Alex looks amazing. In fact, used all the adjectives you can think of. Don't hold back just because you have a girlfriend."

All eyes were suddenly on Alex. The blonde couldn't help but feel a little uneasy. She was silently willing Ryan to hurry up with his opinion so that Taylor could be satisfied and she's no longer be under everyone's scrutiny.

"Taylor's right," answered Ryan. "You really do look amazing Alex. You look stunning. Breathtaking."

"Thank you," replied Taylor, satisfied with Ryan's comment. Everyone gave Taylor a weird look. "What? It's my creation. Should I not be thanked for it?"

"You're right Taylor," replied Alex. "This is _your_ masterpiece. I feel honored that you chose me." Taylor couldn't help but blush. While Alex was teasing her, Taylor knew that the blonde still meant what she said. "Although, the dress does seem to be a bit shorter and tighter than I remembered. Plus, for some odd reason, all my bras disappeared. The only one I had at my disposal was this push up bra, which isn't mind but it is my size. I wonder how that came to be. Now my boobs look bigger than they actually are."

Taylor simply shrugged her shoulders, but she knew she was caught. She gave Alex a cheesy grin. "At least you look hot."

"Right..." said Marissa. She shook her head. She didn't even want to know. Plus, she didn't want to dwell on the thought of Taylor with Alex's bras. She turned to look at Alex. "Alex I want you to meet my dad, Jimmy Cooper. Dad, this is Alex."

Alex got up to shake his hand. The fact that Marissa didn't introduce her as Marissa's girlfriend put to rest any hope Alex still had. "Nice to meet you, Mr. Cooper."

Jimmy shook her hand. "Likewise, but please call me Jimmy. It's nice to finally put a face with the name."

"Same here," replied Alex.

Summer sensed that the three of them needed to be alone. "Seth come dance with me," she commanded as she dragged him to the dance floor.

Taylor caught on. "I want to dance to. Come on Ryan."

"So..." began Alex. "How was your flight?"

"It was good. Listen, I'm going to go find your mom and sister and the Cohens and say hi. Why don't you two finished that dance I so rudely interrupted."

Marissa felt her cheeks burn. "Sorry about that Dad."

"Don't worry about it. You kids go have fun."

Jimmy left leaving the two girls alone again. "So..." began Marissa. "Do you want to dance?"

The hopeful look upon Marissa's face was almost enough to make Alex forget that the brunette didn't consider her to be her girlfriend. Almost. "I'm actually kind of tired. I haven't been sleeping well lately. I think I'll just sit a little while longer."

"Oh," Marissa said, disappointed. "Do you mind if I sit with you? I'd really like to continue our talk." Not able to think of a reason to say no, Alex nodded. Marissa sat beside Alex and took a moment to gather her thoughts. While doing so, her eyes caught sight of her dad with the Cohens. She truly couldn't believe he was here. And he was staying for a week. Marissa made a mental note to spend as much time as she could with him. Who knows when she'll see him again.

While continuing to look her dad's way, she saw Sandy gesturing for someone to come over. It was Ryan and Taylor. _Ryan's such a sweet guy. After everything, he went and did something like this._ A smile crept over Marissa's face. She didn't even notice it, but Alex did.

Alex looked to see what Marissa was smiling about. She followed the brunette's gaze right to Ryan. _Of course_. Sitting there, beside Marissa, Alex finally let it sink in that she wasn't reason enough for Marissa to smile. She wasn't what made Marissa happy. Marissa was the reason Alex worked so hard. Marissa was the reason she woke up everyday. She was the reason the blonde tried to better herself. Marissa was her reason for breathing. Even when they weren't on the best of terms, knowing that Marissa was hers was enough for Alex. Truth of the matter was that Marissa hasn't been hers for a while now. Marissa was her reason for everything. Marissa _was_ her everything. Unfortunately for Alex, Marissa didn't feel the same way. All Alex was to Marissa was a let down, a burden, someone to walk over...a regret. She felt her eyes welling up. She never knew letting the truth set in would hurt so much. She closed her eyes, willing the tears not to fall.

"Alex?" Alex opened her eyes to see Marissa looking at her. "What's wrong?"

Alex scoffed. What wasn't wrong? Realizing your girlfriend didn't love you was only the beginning. She looked at Marissa sitting there, waiting for an answer. She opened her mouth to speak, but closed it quickly. She couldn't trust her emotions right now. The last thing the blonde wanted was to cry in front of person that was responsible for those tears. She needed to leave. She got up and turned around to leave, but a pair of hands stopped her.

"Where are you going?" asked Marissa. Alex stood there for a bit, her back facing Marissa. "Alex, please." Alex felt her tears falling. She went to wipe them, but realized there's no point. They'd only keep coming. She's been holding them in too long. Marissa waited for Alex to face her. When Alex finally did, Marissa was taken back by the tears that were running down her face. She couldn't explain it, but seeing them, the tears, was heartbreaking-even more so than it should be. Marissa didn't know why. She went to wipe them away, but Alex stepped back. The brunette supposed she couldn't blame her for that, but the rejection still hurt. "Alex. Please tell me what's wrong." Alex remained silent. Marissa let go of her grip on Alex. "Please," she whispered.

Alex didn't want to. She just wanted to be alone at the moment, but the concerned look upon Marissa's face seemed genuine. She let out a breath. Alex couldn't hide from the truth of her situation anymore. She needed to accept that Marissa was no longer hers, maybe she never was. She couldn't keep holding on. She and Marissa just weren't compatible. She'd never be enough for the brunette beauty. Even if Marissa did take her back, who's to say that things wouldn't go back to the way they were. Sure it'd be great in the beginning, but it wouldn't last. Alex couldn't go through that again. She couldn't afford for Marissa to revert back to the way she was. It'd hurt too much.

"Baby look here at me. Have you ever seen me this way? I've been fumbling for words through the tears and the hurt…and the pain. I'm going to lay it all on the line tonight, and I think it's time…. to tell this uphill fight goodbye."

"Goodbye?" Marissa started to panic. The night wasn't supposed to go this way. The brunette felt her eyes watering. "Alex, please. Just let me finish what I have to say first."

Alex wiped her tears as she shook her head. "Baby, I know that you've tried to find me somewhere inside of you, but you know you can't lie. Girl, you can't hide the truth." Alex looked around and stopped at the dance floor. She looked at the couples dancing. She felt envious of their happiness. "Sometimes two heart just can't dance to the same beat. So I'll pack up my things, and I'll take what remains of me."

Marissa got out from her seat and put a hand on Alex's arm. Like Alex's, her tears were flowing freely now. "Don't do this Alex. I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for overreacting. I'm sorry for neglecting you. I'm sorry. Just give me another chance. Please." Marissa threw herself in Alex's arms and buried her face into the blonde's chest. "Please," she cried into Alex's chest.

Alex held the sobbing brunette. Alex took in another breath as she gathered up the courage she needed to continue. It would hurt, but staying in a relationship with Marissa would hurt more. She felt Marissa tighten her grip as she continued to cry. For a quick second, Alex almost caved. How could she live without the girl that meant everything to her? She looked around the club and her eyes landed on Ryan. The sight of him was enough to strengthen her resolve again. Alex knew what she had to do.

"I know that I'll never be the one that you need or love."

Marissa shook her head vigorously. "That's not true."

"Yeah baby-"

"No, it's not. Alex, please."

Once again, Alex felt her resolve slipping. She zoomed in on Ryan again. She thought about that day at the beach. She thought about how happy Marissa was with him. How happy she was earlier because of him. "And..." Alex's broken voice faded out. She wiped away more tears and cleared her throat before continuing. "...it's killing me to stand here and see I'm not what you've been dreaming of."

Marissa removed her face from Alex's chest to look at her, but she found that the blonde was looking somewhere else. Marissa followed her line of vision. She realized that Alex was looking at Ryan. "Is this about Ryan? I don't want him. I want _you_. I love _you._ Can't you see, Alex? You're the one that won my heart. You're the winner, not him. It'll never be him. It'll always be you. Only you. You're the winner."

Alex almost scoffed. For whatever reason, Marissa's words angered her slightly. She returned her gaze to Marissa and gave her a sarcastic smile. "Have you ever had to love someone that just don't feel the same?"

"Alex I do. I do feel the same."

Alex shook her head. "Trying to make somebody care for you, the way I do, is like trying to catch the rain. And if love is really forever, then yeah, I'm a winner. A winner at a losing game." Alex saw that Marissa was about to protest again, but she didn't want to hear it. At that moment she honestly didn't care. How dare Marissa claim to love her? After all she put her through! She disentangled herself from Marissa's hold and ran away.

Jodie had been watching the two from her station. When she saw Alex running, she didn't hesitate to go after her. "Hey kid! The table's all yours." She threw him her headphones and left before he could even thank her. She caught up with the blonde right outside the door. She spun the blonde around. She wasn't prepared to see the myriad of tears that were staining Alex's face. "Alex! You okay?"

Alex shook her head. "Take me home Jodie."

"To the apartment?"

"No, home." Jodie nodded and wrapped an arm around the blonde as they made their way home.

Marissa made it outside in time to see Alex in Jodie's arm, walking away. While she may not have had the right to, the brunette couldn't help but feel a little angry. Of course Jodie was the first person she turned to. She laughed dryly at the hypocrisy. Alex used the fact that Ryan was her first love and still her friend against her. Yet, Alex was the one in her ex's arm at the moment. Marissa turned around and walked back into the club. She went directly to the bar.

Too many drinks and a few hours later, a very drunk Marissa was hit with a thought. She now knew why the sight of Alex crying got to her. Throughout their time together, Marissa had only seen Alex cry once. That was the night of the bonfire. Sure she'd seen the blonde get teary-eyed, but Alex never let the tears fall. _Oh no_. The thought was enough to sober Marissa up a little. She made her towards the exit. Then she felt a hand on her arm.

"Marissa, where are you going?"

Marissa turned to see that it was Summer. "Sum, I have to go to her. I have to apologize until she takes me back." Marissa attempted to move again, but the short brunette stopped her.

"Coop, you're in no condition-"

"So come with me, but come now. I can't waste anymore time" Summer nodded in agreement.

The two made it back to the apartment in record time. Marissa quickly used her key to open the door. "Alex?" The sight of the dark apartment was discomforting for Marissa. "No…"

"Maybe she's just out," offered Summer.

Marissa wanted to believe that, but something told her that wasn't the case. She quickly made a dash towards. The bedroom. Empty. She looked around the room and saw a note with her name on it on the nightstand. She walked to it and realized that there was also an envelope from Berkley. She could care less about Berkley at the moment. She held Alex's note in her hands as she sat on the bed. She just stared at it as she felt her tears resurfacing.

"Coop?"

Marissa looked up to see Summer at the doorway. "I…I'm afraid to read it."

Summer made her way towards the brunette and sat beside her. "Do you want me…."

Marissa shook her head. With trembling fingers, Marissa opened the note. It was just one sentence, but that one sentence stripped away Marissa's last ounce strength. She openly started to sob. Summer grabbed the brunette and tried to comfort her the best she could. She didn't have to know what the note said to know that Marissa had lost Alex. "Coop…" Summer was at a lost of words. She knew nothing she could say would make her best friend feel better. Marissa just continued sobbing in Summer's arm. She held on to her friend tightly. In doing so, the note fell from her hand on to the ground. Summer looked at it and held on to Marissa. Given the strength of her sobs, Summer was afraid Marissa wouldn't be able to recover. She glanced again at the note.

One sentence. That was all it took.

"I'm tired of losing."

**THE END**

* * *

**Yep, you read it correctly. That's the end. Don't hate me though. I do have a sequel planned. It'll better explain everything (like what was really up with Marissa). I've already started working on it. I'll post it in a couple of days hopefully. That is, if you guys are interested in it. If not, then...oh well. Not much I can do about that. Also, I used lyrics from the Rascal Flatts song, "Winner At A Losing Game." It started when Alex said, "Baby look here at me" and it ended with "I'm tired of losing." I tweaked it a little, but it's still pretty much the same. Only the words Alex said with Marissa, and of course that last line, are lyrics. I claim no ownership to that song either. It's all Rascal Flatts and Lyrics Street Records.  
**


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